gentlemonkey Posted September 25, 2001 Report Share Posted September 25, 2001 There once was an overweight Taiwanese masseuse named Luli. She had been a masseuse for 10 years, and loved her work.. Every Sunday, she had the day off, and loved sleeping in and having ice cream for breakfast.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bouche Posted September 25, 2001 Report Share Posted September 25, 2001 She made sure that the ice cream was exactly -2°C and that it was served in a pewter dish with little gnome characters molded into the sides that served as a resting place in between her silk covered sumo-thighs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neroboy Posted September 26, 2001 Report Share Posted September 26, 2001 on this particular Sunday, she was on her sofa watching 100 Huntley St. Eating her pralines, caramel and cream.. and heard a thump on her front porch. She quickly withdrew her vibrator, threw on her robe, and went to see what had caused the noise... When she neared the front door she could smell stale beer through the screen.. and when she tried opening the door, she noticed it was catching on a drunken head resting on her door mat.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gentlemonkey Posted September 26, 2001 Author Report Share Posted September 26, 2001 Luli forced the door open, waking the drunken visitor up in the process. He tried to stand up, but fell on his face once again. His breath was turning Luli's stomach. Still she couldnt help herself, she had to nurse him back to strength.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted September 26, 2001 Report Share Posted September 26, 2001 "Boochiepoo!", she cried, "Oh my God, just like old times!"She turned around, went to her closet and pulled out her best Moo-Moo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarcO Posted September 26, 2001 Report Share Posted September 26, 2001 "I love the shrimpy smell of your moo-moo", he said with a beery belch."I must have it cleaned." she laughed. "The cats have been following me all around the park.""I thought you didn't go to the park anymore," said Boochie suspiciously. "I haven't seen you around."Her face turned as pink as shrimp and her heart as cold as the ice cream she had been inserting in her face just moments before."You fucker!" she screamed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gentlemonkey Posted September 27, 2001 Author Report Share Posted September 27, 2001 Boochie tried to force a grin, but ended up forcing up a stream of lime green vomit that covered Luli's face... "Ghhaaaaaaaa!!! Look at me.. " " u usuu sorry luli.. " "I suppose i better go hop in the shower.. you try and relax on the couch.. i'll be back" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pablo Sanchez Posted October 4, 2001 Report Share Posted October 4, 2001 Luli turned on the water and hopped in. She stood soaking in the steady hot stream and washed the vomit from her face. She was relaxed, maybe too relaxed. It felt as if her skin was loosning. The soap holder seemed higher than normal. It was then that she realized she was shrinking. she tried to scramble out, but it was too late. The water streamed madly like ocean waves. Finnally she was swept away, into the drain and began a wild water slide ride down the pipes...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bouche Posted October 4, 2001 Report Share Posted October 4, 2001 As the super mario bros. theme raced through her head like a diatonic single-voiced requiem of harmony and syncopation, Luli was astonished to see all of the treasures whizzing by her at the speed of water. First the end of an old thermometer, next a giant mass of Captian Crunch cereal that made her think back to the dream she had had one morning, while laying on her brand new Raymore and Flannagin sofa, eating a giant bowl of ice cream for breakfast, when a knock came...."Wait a minute" she realized, "that was no dream! Boochieppoooooo!!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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