Jump to content
Jambands.ca

When the circus comes to town


doubleB

Recommended Posts

So last night, curiosity got the better of me…. I went to Babylon to check out The Jim Rose Circus Sideshow…. I don’t even know where to begin telling you all about this….. Let’s start at the beginning…

I strolled into the bar to the sounds of one of the worst bands I have heard in a long time… Perhaps they weren’t that bad but certainly not my bag. They were a throwback to 80’s hair bands… Their saving grace was the stage show they traveled with, full on lights and smoke machine meant my buzz was engaged visually if not by the music. Funny thing about this band, every song was about weed, “This one is for all the stoners” or “here is a song about smoking” or “Does anyone smoke weed?” or “ let’s change the pace… here is a love song…..about the love of weed”…..hahahahahahaha, they had personality anyway..

Setbreak hit and I started to wonder if coming to see this was a mistake…. Glad I stayed.

The prelude to the Jim Rose Circus was a song entitled “the lap dance is better when the stripper is crying” …. Kinda set the tone for this Springer meets Ripleys event.

The first freak to come on stage was a 400 pound dude who had Lauzon esq control of a fucking YO-YO…. He did a choreographed routine to the sounds of Black Sabbath’s War Pigs…. I can’t even begin to describe the mad shit he was doing with that YO-YO…. Let’s just say, this was no smothers brothers routine….. in fact he might have ate the Smothers brothers….

Then Jim Rose stuck a spoon up his nose and licked it…

Next was Mexican Transvestite Wrestling….. Take a second and imagine this scene…. 2 ugly hairy dudes in masks and tights…. Each also wore a strap on cock…. Seems the object of Mexican Transvestite Wrestling is to stick you cock in your opponent’s mouth for a 3 count…. Things were going well for the dude I was cheering for until he fell victim to a nasty cock block which resulted in him being beaten with his own strap on then forced to swallow for a 3 count… fucking hilarious! I just can’t seem to pick a winner.

What followed was a routine of typical freak show attractions including the human dart board, straight jacket escape, frying pan to the head, eating and regurgitating a gold fish and of course…. A sledge hammer to the balls….. ouch

Then came the piece de la resistance…. Out came the toaster. They used this toaster to electrify each other and lifted it off the ground with their tongue, ears, and of course their cocks….

I guess Jim’s big thing (pardon the pun) is to do puppetry of the penis…. As he announced this, some dude in the audience gets up and walks to the stage…. With no fucking pants on… Jim screamed in horror and shamed him into putting it away! Then Jim “took it out” …. Enough said

It is a shame I had no one to share that with, I’m sure I’m forgetting some stuff, my stomach still huts from the laughter…. Good monday

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Everyone should have gone. I had no idea that was up!

Jim Rose circus is nothing like anything else!

I saw it YEARS ago in kingston, and mr. lifto was the highlight.

Although, I watched a guy guzzle back a jug of ketchup, eggs, mayonaaise, beer, sardines, all blended and then he regurgitated it into a glass and then a freak in the audience DRANK it!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

nothing more than that eh? would you try it? ha ha ha! yes, i'm going to check out his website at some point to see if the rumours were true about an injury....

not right now though, i've screwed up my back and have to get away from this computer...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It sounds like you walked into a Hunter S. Thompson story...I'm reading it, and thinking, in my best Marlon Brando voice, "The horror...the horror..."

But I have put "Mexican Transvestite Wrestling" on my list of song titles to use...

I'm not sure if I'd've been able to handle it all. Good work (and nicely written), doubleB.

Aloha,

Brad

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Back at you sloth....

Where you getting hammered tonight? Giggles and I are hitting the market patio scene as soon as I free myself from this repressive (but air conditioned) classroom.

Anyone feel like sunning themselfs on the market after work... give me a call

Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...