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ROLLING STONES: OFFICIAL PRESS RELEASE

MICK ANNOUNCES OFFICIAL NEW SPELLING OF BAND NAME

(New York, NY) - June 6, 2002 - Mick Jagger, Keith Richards, Charlie Watts

and Ronnie Wood held a press conference today to promote their upcoming

2002/2003 World Tour and unveil the dynamic new spelling of the legendary

band's name: The Rolling $tones. Mick pointed out that the dollar sign

replacing the "S" in the name will not affect the pronunciation. However,

seeing The Rolling $tones in print, you realize just how rich and greedy

the $tones are these days. Mick continued, "to some people the name change

is a bold or arrogant move, but so is charging $300 a ticket. That $300

ticket doesn't include our $90 scalper's fee that we hide as the "fan club"

charge at our official website. Over 500,000 suckers, I mean fans, bought

$300 tickets and we tacked on the extra $90 to as many people as we could.

That was an arrogant move, but 98% of the seats have sold. I feel that 98%

of the fans will go for our new name spelling also."

While Watts was his usual quiet self, Wood added "the Voodoo Lounge Tour

was only $50 for floor seats, but we wanted to raise prices 600% for this

tour. The $tones are now eldery people that won't live long enough to spend

all this money, but we sure enjoy taking it."

Mick interrupted with "Our fans know it hasn't been about the music for

decades. The $tones main focus is on expensive stage sets for me to prance

around on. The $tones are about my 12 outfit changes per show. By the way,

I'll be wearing a black leather piece for "Paint It Black" and a sultry red

number for "Ruby Tuesday." Honey, let me tell you, Elton John's costume

designer isn't cheap."

As the conference ended, Richards was awakened and suddenly realized he was

in public. Keith mumbled "People ask me why I don't sing more with the

$tones - then what would Mick have left to do?"

The Rolling Stones 2002/2003 World Tour kicks off September 3, 2002 at the

Fleet Center in Boston, MA.

funny stuff...

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sup man.

isnt it ridiculous.

I would never pay 300 dollars a ticket to see the money hogging $tones.

Especially after the comments you just posted, and also i dont know what mick is talking about when he says even the fans know its not about the music,is a bunch of bullshit. Why would i go just to see his faggoty skinny ass running around the stage like a fool. Its always about the MUSIC, and that should never change.

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quote:

Originally posted by jason sanislo:

[QB]Why would i go just to see his faggoty skinny ass running around the stage like a fool. [QB]

Classic one, Jason!!!!-

I have a good friend who is/has plopped down something like, oh, 20 gazillion dollars for the best ACC and SkyDome seats he can get for the $tones. I love him, but I think he's fucked. He understands.

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quote:

Originally posted by MarcO:

I have a good friend who is/has plopped down something like, oh, 20 gazillion dollars for the best ACC and SkyDome seats he can get for the $tones. I love him, but I think he's fucked. He understands.

Hahahahahaha!! Yes, he does understand... But at least he's happy?

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