CyberHippie Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 I work in web/advertising so daily conversations and meetings are saturated with Buzzwords. I loathe them!! I'd better get back to work, I want to ensure I'm remaining "Profitable". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieDon'tSurf Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 Metrics...i frikkin' hate this one...it gets tacked on to the end of almost every noun like design-metrics, research-metrics, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada... win-win gets me too... this is my first extended experience in a '9-to-5' office setting and the buzzwords are killing me...another one is product/company branding...made me hack up a hair ball the first time i heard that one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treyter Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 yes yes cyberhippie---i was just speaking with booche and he explained that he too must get back to work to ensure that he is being "customer-centric" while ensuring that he conveys "the big picture" to all of his "affiliates" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brels Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 I would have to add "moving forward" to the list of lamest buzzwords. Or how about this buzz-phrase, "let's take this offline" - uughh!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treyter Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 Our new UltraSeamless Whizbang Software combines ABC's with XYZ's industry-leading policy management solutions, enabling enterprises to seamlessly manage complex customer and partner relationships in an open and scalable manner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 good one - i write some of that crap for a living - you're very good at it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhishyK Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 I work in the world of web design/graphics/search engines too. I use Macromedia Dreamweaver every day and I have this amazing plugin for filler text to use in a web template. It's called "Insert Corporate MumboJumbo" - you just tell it how many characters you want and you get the following. Here's 500 characters worth: Through a top-down, proactive approach we can remain customer focused and goal-directed, innovate and be an inside-out organization which facilitates sticky web-readiness transforming turnkey eyeballs to brand 24/365 paradigms with benchmark turnkey channels implementing viral e-services and dot-com action-items while we take that action item off-line and raise a red flag and remember touch base as you think about the red tape outside of the box and seize B2B e-tailers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treyter Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 hahahahahahahah "Insert Corporate MumboJumbo" that's fuggin cool well i'm off to go cross some t's and dot some i's Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
secondtube Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 ummmm, ((((((( . ))))))) never ever have i felt so in need of one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arcane Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 quote:Originally posted by Low Roller: Where I work, promotions are directly in relation to the number of buzzwords you use. Some of the stupidest buzzwords I hear on a daily basis are: - Action Items - Generate Opportunity for Quotation - Mission critical Low Roller is absolutely correct, but he hasn't related the degree of this problem. I used to work at the same company, in the Marketing department. In my duties, I was expected to use these buzzwords to promote the products. (Yes, the Misery Chick actually has some talent for positive spin.) In general, the problem isn't so much the use of the buzzwords (or buzzphrases) as their misuse and overuse. I said, *in general*. My favourite: "Leverage your resources." It has a legitimate meaning and use (other than kindling). However, outside of the Marketing department, who the hell knows or cares what it is? Good grief. It's this kind of bullshit that makes the marketeers looks like clowns in the eyes of the technical staff. That, and this nasty habit of promoting products that haven't been completed (or designed) yet. Anyway, I have my own fun contribution to the list: "Ruptured." "That thing is so *ruptured,* man! Who knew you could do that with digital clock parts?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 e-tailers -- that makes me giggle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arcane Posted July 30, 2002 Report Share Posted July 30, 2002 "Proactive"--THAT one makes me wanna hurl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treyter Posted July 31, 2002 Report Share Posted July 31, 2002 buzzword: A word or phrase connected with a specialized field or group that usually sounds important or technical and is used primarily by idiots to impress those who they presume to be stupid. i hate them, and anyone who uses them in any (be it professional, or social) situation/conversation with me, loses my interest very quickly: PROACTIVE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Low Roller Posted July 31, 2002 Report Share Posted July 31, 2002 Where I work, promotions are directly in relation to the number of buzzwords you use. Some of the stupidest buzzwords I hear on a daily basis are: - Action Items - Generate Opportunity for Quotation - Mission critical Anybody ever play any Bullshit Bingo? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treyter Posted July 31, 2002 Report Share Posted July 31, 2002 nice signature Low Roller! haha Bullshit Bingo = rich i would love to walk into a meeting and actually play that game! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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