Chastity vow

[Kelly-Anne]

Well it’s over. My longest relationship yet. It last 9 weeks. I’m starting to realize that having sex within 45 minutes of meeting someone is probably not the right thing to do. I think I may have a low self-esteem problem or something.

Anyway….I think it may have also been the age difference between us. He was only 16 and I don’t think his mom was crazy about me taking him to NYC for 10 days and living on the streets panhandling.

But I have to turn the corner and change or I’ll just be some old hippie whore attending shows and end up being shared by bands like a spliff.

I decided that I need a life style change. And chastity is a lifestyle that will prevent me from ruining more lives.

I’ve realized that premarital sex is dangerous because it robs your Spirituality....

YES... SPIRITUALLY..

And one day I want to get married and have kids…..I decided to write a letter to my future husband now, so I meet him he’ll know I’ve been a good girl.

Dear Sweet pie,

It is important for me to write to you now, even before we know each other, because there is still time for both of us to think about our future and to make wise decisions.

There are so many things I want to tell you. Girls are like that, you know. I want to share my dreams with you. I want to trust you to listen and to care about what I say,. You are very important to me.

When I think about getting married, I think about much more than just the wedding dress, bridesmaids, flowers, invitations and parties. To me, getting married means sharing the rest of my life with you.

Growing old together - 'til death do us part - with a lot of living in between. It means growing and changing and living through the good times as well as the bad. It means loving each other when it is difficult.

I look forward to a happy life with you and our children, but I'm not so unrealistic that I think we won't have any problems or difficulties. Those will be the growing times when our love and commitment will be tested, and we will emerge stronger, wiser and more deeply in love. I know that we need each other to be holy and to become the man and woman God created s to be.

God has already chosen us for each other. That is so awesome to me! I can hardly wait to meet you, but I know I have to be patient because it will only happen when it is God's time for us to come together. Until then, I can think about you and pray for you and hope that you are thinking about me and praying for me, too. I hope so much that you are waiting for me just as I am waiting for you. I want both of us to do what is right. I want to respect you, and I want you to respect me. I want us to be able to recognize the goodness in each other.

I want you to touch my heart with your goodness.

A friend told me once that it is necessary to know what is important to me and to have some "major" requirements when it comes to selecting my spouse. That way it will be easier for me to recognize you when we meet. The "majors" are basically those few character traits that are absolutely essential to me; traits that I just could not compromise on for any reason. I know the most important "major" is that my husband will have to know God, to love Him and to be willing to keep Him first in our lives.

I have seen so much joy and happiness in families where God is the center, and now that I am older, I realize how important God is. I want our family to be happy too, and I know we cannot do it without God.

The next "Major" would be unselfishness. I'm not perfect in this area either, but I want both of us to be unselfish. We cannot go through life thinking only of ourselves. We have to be willing to make sacrifices for each other and for our children. We have to be willing to love. That's not always easy, but unless we are committed to a lifetime of loving unselfishly, our marriage will never succeed.

We have to be honest too. No marriage can survive without honesty and trust. I know we will spend many hours just talking and learning about each other by sharing our thoughts and our feelings, our hopes, our dreams and our fears. I want us to be very comfortable with each other.

I want so much to love you. And, I want you to love me. I want to be cherished, to be the most important person in your life, to be your most intimate friend. I want to be your wife. I want you tenderness and affection, your kindness and you strength. I want to be there for you when you feel happy and on top of the world, and I want to be there when your spirit is crushed.

I want to feel protected and secure in your love and to trust you at all times. I want you to feel safe with me and never to be ashamed to talk about your fears and weaknesses.

I want to encourage you to stand up for your beliefs and always to do what is right. I want to stand beside you as we go through life together.

Remember, I said the wedding dress is not all that important? Well, the most important thing about the wedding dress is what it represents. The beauty of the white fabric symbolizes the purity of the bride. I want my dress to be that symbol to you. I want to cherish my virginity so that my gift of myself to you will be pure and holy. I want so much for you to do the same for me.

The world has cheapened and trivialized our beautiful gift of sexuality. It has ignored its awesome power to unite a man and a woman in marriage and to be the source of their greatest blessings, their children. I don't want us ever to lose that sense of awe and reverence for this wonderful gift God designed for married couples. The power of our sexuality is so sacred. It is important to me that you believe that, too. It's a "major". We don't have to make all the mistakes many of our older friends have made. We can have God's best if we do it His way.

So, why in the world am I telling you all of this? Because it's on my mind. I do think about you a lot. I hope and pray that we will be strong enough to combat the lies the world has told us. The things we do and say today can affect the rest of our lives. We do have to think and to care about the way we live today. You are so important to me. Our future is important to me. Our marriage and our children are important to me. That's why all of this matters.

I want to be your wife, and I want you to be my husband. Neither of us will ever be the perfect spouse, but we can strive to please God and to do His will. By doing that now and after we are married, I know we will have the grace we need to help each other and our children get to Heaven. And, after all, that's really all that matters in the end.

So, future husband, I hope this letter makes a difference to you. I really do exist. Please wait for me. I am waiting for you.

Kelly-Anne

[AdamH]

See topic just posted. And stitch on your scarlet letter harlot.

[MoMack]

You had me at 45 minutes.

You lost me at god.

lol.

[shitidiot]

i got 45 min to wait, what you doin'right now.

[PhishyK]

lol...

stopping sex out of guilt is a lot like trying to stop smoking chron out of guilt. The little kid inside you will yell "fu©k off, i wanna screw/smoke!!" as loud as it can until you relent, and then you'll feel even more guilty.

Try accepting your desires and choosing your choices and you may find that you'll end up making the right choice in the end.

I am going thru a lot of stuff in this regard these days myself.

[bradm]

Would a vow of chastity (such as described in the first post in this topic) preclude the vower from self-pleasure, such as masturbation? If so, does it matter whether the pleasuring culminates in orgasm?

Aloha,

Brad

[Steve from Cleveland]

Not to trivialize or anything, but this reminded me of something I heard about a long time ago... I found the website again. Check it out

http://www.haven.org/~hauman/InfinityDog/technicalvirgin/

[Calamity Jane]

Would a vow of chastity (such as described in the first post in this topic) preclude the vower from self-pleasure, such as masturbation? If so, does it matter whether the pleasuring culminates in orgasm?

Aloha,

Brad

I always wondered about this too, esp. with young Christian girls calling themselves the "Bride of Christ" and "saving themselves." Well, what a better bang than Christ, I always thought -- I mean if you can't get yourself off in the name of the Lord Almightly, then....

by the way K, I like this philosophy and may just be on the road to forgiveness concerning your kd lang comments

Try accepting your desires and choosing your choices and you may find that you'll end up making the right choice in the end.

[PhishyK]

by the way K, I like this philosophy and may just be on the road to forgiveness concerning your kd lang comments

Try accepting your desires and choosing your choices and you may find that you'll end up making the right choice in the end.

Hehe... gee, thanks. If only you had any chance of molding me in to the refined and well-mannered young man that you'd like to!

[Calamity Jane]

if you think I like well-mannered young men, you're 'humping the wrong leg!' :: :: :: :: :: ::

[Lazlo]

if you think I like well-mannered young men, you're 'humping the wrong leg!' :: :: :: :: :: ::

You mean there's a right leg to hump. Personally I prefer vagina or a resonable facsimile.

[PhishyK]

I'm with you man, but... what counts as a reasonable facsimile?? *shudder*

[Gr8FuL]

if you think I like well-mannered young men, you're 'humping the wrong leg!' :: :: :: :: :: ::

hahahhaha

Wow thats pretty intense!! So you found god and decided to stop having sex?? did this happen while on any psychedelics?

[Calamity Jane]

Steve -- I finally found time to follow your link:

[color:"blue"] Technical Virgin Pledge:

Print this pledge and sign it. Print extra copies for your friends and ask them to sign it, too. Then enjoy your new life of sexual fulfillment free of the risk of pregnancy!

1. I believe that vaginal heterosexual intercourse and its accompanying possible consequences of pregnancy should be postponed until marriage or college, whichever comes first.

However:

2. I believe that orgasms are an important part of a healthy and balanced life.

3. I believe that masturbation should be encouraged among males and females of all ages, both by manual methods and with the use of vibrators, dildos and other such devices.

4. I believe that sharing orgasms with others, via manual, oral, and anal sex between consenting partners, whether of my same sex or the opposite sex (providing proper safety techniques are utilized) is a moral and desirable activity for myself and my peers.

5. I will encourage others to join me in my beliefs and activities.

Signed:

and...teen testimonials:

BOBBY L., Detroit, MI

Yo, I know how to treat my girl right. I always show her the same respect I want to get back from her. I never ask her to swallow my spunk until I go down on her first. It's just common courtesy.

MARIA F., Zebulon, GA

When I started dating, boys always expected me to have intercourse with them. I knew I couldn't resist the peer pressure alone, so now I double-date with my pal Shelly. Now when boys pressure us for sex, we say "no" together – then satisfy them by putting on a hot girl-girl show in the back seat.

MARK G., Atomic City, ID

When I started my junior year of high school, I was already the captain of the football team and the baseball team, I was a straight-A honors student, and girls were offering themselves to me. I just couldn't say no to easy sex and free booze, but I knew I was risking my future. So I prayed on it, drove to Boise, and got this butt-ugly haircut. I haven't been laid since, praise Jesus!

At first, I was thinking 'kinda cool, very progressive, but then quickly realized this was in jest. However, I have heard of something similar that was actually in earnest (it may have been the "Brides of Christ" I mentioned, but this is quite definitely a spoof:

this site is a parody of "teen abstinence" sites. We feel that the entire abstinence approach to teen sexuality is unrealistic and misguided, and this site is our response to that. We believe that if the current abstinence movement continues to preach total abstinence, it will send the message that only heterosexual vaginal intercourse is "real sex," and that other types of sexual behavior are not "really sex." In that sense, Technical Virgin is intended as a sort of cautionary example.

it actually dovetails nicely with the post on teen oral sex and how teens don't see that as 'real' sex.

[bouche]

just buy one of these....

[Gr8FuL]

ohhh sh!t...OUCH!!!!Just seeing that Hurts

[Kelly-Anne]

Tease if you want to think you're being cool. But Satan will use people in any way he can to get people to turn away from Jesus. Having premarital believe it or not is one of Satan's most successful ways to get you away from Jesus. It doesn't matter what other people think of you.

[Gr8FuL]

uh huh, why does ur signature say "make love" after "smoke some of Jesus's weed" if ur not into the premarital?

p.s-If you think jesus's weed is good, you gotta try some of this new east coast Hasha Strand, that sh!t'll have ya Higher than Heaven in a Snap

[CookieMonster]

Tease if you want to think you're being cool. But Satan will use people in any way he can to get people to turn away from Jesus. Having premarital believe it or not is one of Satan's most successful ways to get you away from Jesus. It doesn't matter what other people think of you.

How do you know?

Do you talk to satan?

Does he call you at home? ::

[Kelly-Anne]

Jesuses weed in his words. And I don't talk to Satan. But I have seen the evil that he has launched into this world.

Birth control is one of those evils.

[CookieMonster]

And I don't talk to Satan.

then how do you know

[Kelly-Anne]

How do I know? I have driven down his highway to hell as AC/DC did, I ridden his crazy train as did Dusty Rhoades.

Why do doubt his existence? Why are you defending him? Sinner.

[CookieMonster]

Hmmm. If questioning your "knowledge" makes me a sinner, then I need to go take a bath 'cause I'm one dirty girl!

[bouche]

The 'J' is silent...right?

[freerange]

dusty rhoades...the wrestler?