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QOTD 06-13-07: Titties or Beer?


MarcO
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Titties And Beer Lyrics

» Frank Zappa

It was the blackest night

There was no moon in sight

You know the stars ain't shinin'

'Cause the sky's too tight

I heard the scarey wind

I seen some ugly trees

There was a werewolf honkin'

'Long the aide of me

I'm mean 'n I'm bad, y'know I ain't no sissy

Got a big titty girly by the name of Chrissy

Talkin' about her 'n my bike 'n me . . .

'N this ride up the Mountain of Mystery, mystery

I noticed even the crickets

Was actin' weird up here

So I figured I might

Just drink a little beer

I said, "Gimme summa that what yer suckin' on . . "

But there was no reply

'Cause she was gone . . .

"Where's those titties I like so well,

'n' my godam beer!"

Is what I started to yell, then I heard this noise

Like a crunchin' twig, 'n up jumped the Devil, . .

He's about this big, . .

He had a red suit on

An' a widow's peak

An' then a pointed tail

'N like a sulphur reek

Yes, it was him awright,

I swear I knowed it was

He had some human flesh

Stuck underneath his claws

You know, it looked to me

Like it was titty skin

I said, "You sonofabifch!"

'Cause I was mad at him.

Well he just got out the floss

'N started cleanin' his fang

So I shot him with my shooter.

Said: BANG BANG BANG

The sucker just laughed 'n said, "Put it away . . .

You know, I ate her all up . . . now what you gonna say?"

YOU ATE MY CHRISSY? "Yeah! titties 'n all!"

WHAT ABOUT THE BEER THEN? "Were the cans this tall?"

EVEN HER BOOTS? "Would I lie to you?"

SHIT, YOU MUSTA BEEN HUNGRY! "Yes, this is true'.

'WELL DON'T THEY PAY Y'ALL GOOD FOR THE

STUFF THAT YOU DO?

"I can't complain when the checks come through . . ''

WELL I WANT MY CHRISSY, 'N I WANT MY BEER

SO YOU JUST BARF IT BACK UP NOW, DEVIL,

DO YOU HEAR!

"Blow it out your ass, motorcycle man! I am fhe Devil,

Do you understand?

Just what will you give me for your titties and beer?

I suppose you noticed this little contract here, . ''

YER GODDAM RIGHT, YOU SON-OF-A-WHORE,

THAT'S ABOUT THE ONLY REASON

I LEARNED WRITIN' FOR . . .

GIMME THAT PAPER ... BET YER ASS

I'LL SIGN . . . 'CAUSE I NEED A BEER, 'N IT'S TITTY-

SQUEEZIN' TIME!

"You can't fool me, man . . . you ain't that bad . . .

I mean you shoulda seen some of fhe souls I had . . .

Why there was Milhous Nixon 'n Agnew too . . .

'n both of fhose suckers was worse 'n you . .

"WELL, LET'S MAKE A DEAL IF YOU THINK THAT'S TRUE

I MEAN, YOU'RE THE DEVIL SO ... WHATCHA GONNA DO?

(improvised dialog)

"No! Don't sign it! Give me time to think ...

I mean ... hold on a minute, boy . . . that's

Magic Ink!"

And then the Devil puked

'N out jumped m'girl

They heard the titties PLOP-PLOPPIN'

All around the world, she said:

"I GOT ME THREE BEERS 'N A FIST FULLA DOWNS,

AN' I'M GONNA GET WRECKED, SO FUCK YOU CLOWNS!"

And then she gave us the finger,

It was rigid 'n stiff,

That's when the Devil, he farted

An' she went right over the cliff

The Devil was mad took off to my pad

I swear I do declare!

How did she get back there?

I swear I do declare!

How did she get back there?

etc. repeat

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from the Urban Dictionary...

The breasts of a male or female, can also be called:

APPLES

BALCONY

BALLOONS

BANGERS

BAZONGAS

BAZOOMS

BEAN BAGS

BIG BROWN EYES

BON-BONS

BOOBIES

BOOBS

BOTTLES

BOULDERS

BULLETS

BUMPERS

BUSTERS

BUTTERBAGS

CANTELOUPES

GAZONGAS

GLANDS

GLOBES

GRAPEFRUITS

GUAVAS

HANDFUL

HAND-WARMERS

HEADERS

HEADUGHTS

HILLS

HONKERS

HOOTERS

HOWITZERS

JABOOS

JIBS

JUGS

JUMBOS

KAZONGAS

KNOBS

KNOCKERS

LACTOIDS

LOAVES

LOBLOLLIES

LOVE BUBBLES

LOVE MUFFINS

LULUS

LUNGS

MAMMETS

MAMS

MANGOES

MEATBALLS

MEAT LOAVES

MELONS

MILK CANS

MILK SHOP

MOUNDS

MOUNT OF ULIES

MOUNTAINS

MUFFINS

MULLIGANS

MURPHIES

NANCIES

NATURE'S FONTS

NIBLETS

NINNIES

NIPPERS

NODULES

NOOGIES

NUBBIES

NUTS

ORANGES

ORBS

OTTOMANS

PAIR

PALOOKAS

PAPAYAS

PAPS

PEACHES

PEAKS

PEARS

PECTS

PEEPERS

PILLOWS

PIPS

POKERS

PONTOONS

POTATOES

PUMPKINS

PUMPS

RIB CUSHIONS

ROUNDIES

SANDBAGS

SCONES

SCOOPS

SET

SHAKERS

SHIMMIES

SKIN SACKS

SNUGGLE PUPS

SPHERES

SPUDS

STACKS

STUFFING

SWEATER MEAT

SWEET ROLLS

SWINGERS

TAMALES

TETONS

TIDBITS

TITS

TITTERS

TI=IES

TOMATOES

TOOTERS

TORPEDOES

TWANGERS

TWIN PEAKS

TWOFERS

UMLAUTS

UPPER DECK

WALDOS

WARHEADS

WARTS

WATERMELONS

WHOPPERS

WOBBLERS

WONGAS

YABBOS

YAMS

ZEPPELINS

Dude, those zepplins are fucking huge!

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