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England squad to employ Viagra in WC to combat the high altitudes


Davey Boy 2.0
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Hopefully this'll help prevent the usual English cock-ups. Going to be a hard choice for the players, though. If they end up winning the tournament they'll have to erect a Viagra statue at Wembley. Of course as long as they play well they'll be able to keep their heads up high, whatever the outcome.

etc; etc;

ENGLAND'S football team will be offered Viagra for next year's World Cup games in South Africa in an attempt to boost their performance ... on the pitch.

Scientists claim the blue pills will enhance the performance of coach Fabio Capello's men.

Viagra will apparently help the boys raise their game and help them beat the effects of playing at altitude.

News of the World reveals that England's World Cup 2010 football squad may well be popping the blue pills in next summer's Finals to help improve lung capacity.

Manager Fabio Capello is considering dishing out Viagra before every match after research by scientists proved the drug could help players perform better.

The England team plan to have their training camp based in Rustenburg, South Africa, which is 4,921ft above sea level.

And experts reckon Viagra can help the lads combat altitude, which affected England's 1970 World Cup flops in Mexico. Sports scientist Richard Pullen has been commissioned by the FA to come up with special training techniques to help beat this altitude issue.

He said: "I'll point out to the England squad the potential benefits of using Viagra for games played at altitude.

"It's scientifically proven that the process of how Viagra works in the body, by enlarging the blood vessels, can improve performance of some athletes.

"Also known as sildenafil, it's been used by football teams in South America and some cyclists because it's not a banned substance.

"I'm sure several countries at the World Cup will consider using Viagra."

But Pullen warned: "There can be some side effects which might adversely effect performance, such as blurred vision, headaches or flushed faces."

England's chief physio Gary Lewin will analyse the pros and cons of using Viagra before making a recommendation to Capello, who has the final say.

It would then be up to players if they wanted to use Viagra.

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Guest Low Roller
But Pullen warned: "There can be some side effects which might adversely effect performance, such as blurred vision, headaches or flushed faces."

No other side effect that you can think of? Really?

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