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Schwa.

Story: The Epic Homeless Guy Conspiracy

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'A cat has received a jury duty summons after his owner put his name on the pets section of a census form. Tabby Sal has been called to sit in judgement at a US court, even though owner Anna Esposito filed for his disqualification on the grounds he was 'unable to speak and understand English'. Bizarrely, officials denied the request, meaning Sal and Mrs Esposito may have to attend a Boston court on March 23. The cat is currently searching for a get-out 'claws'. The bemused owner said: 'When they ask him guilty or not guilty, what's he supposed to say - meow?' A U.S judicial branch website states that 'jurors are not expected to speak perfect English' - Metro.

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