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Stressed??


doug
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IMPORTANT, PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: If you answer "yes" to two or more of the following items, there is a great chance that you may be suffering from stress or some form of mental illness. If this is the case, please, print out this page and take it to your doctor (Note: Important)! Remember, it is you and you alone who really knows yourself well enough and can answer these questions in a totally honest and open manner. Cheating will only hurt yourself and those who are "sane" and need to live with you! It is your health and wellness, an important issue, so please take your time. Here are the items...

You can achieve a "Runner's High" by sitting up.

The sun is too loud.

Trees begin to chase you.

You can see individual air molecules vibrating.

You begin to explore the possibility of setting up an I.V.drip solution of espresso.

You wonder if brewing is really a necessary step for the consumption of coffee.

You can hear mimes.

You tell a very large group of people that they should put their clocks ahead in October during Daylight Saving Time.

You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before.

You believe that if you think hard enough, you can fly.

Things become "Very Clear."

You ask the drive-through attendant if you can get your order to go.

You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before.

You begin speaking in a language that only you and Chandeliers can understand.

The less sense matter and matter is more than sense.

You keep yelling "STOP TOUCHING ME!!!!" even though you are the only one in the room.

You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before.

Your heart beats in 7/8 time.

You and Reality file for divorce.

You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before.

You can skip without a rope.

It appears that people are speaking to you in binary code.

You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before.

You can travel without moving.

Antacid tablets become your sole source of nutrition.

You discover the aesthetic beauty of office supplies.

You have an irresistible urge to bite the noses of the people you are talking to.

You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before.

Losing your mind was okay, but when the voices in your head quieted, it was like losing your best friend.

(P.S. This is a joke ...I don't want people to think I really think I'm crazy or that I really filled this form out and sent to my doctor...Hello!!! Of course I don't think I'm crazy...I'm totally sane...this morning they said they were concerned about me...they said I'm crazy...but what do Cheerios know? Just a bunch of floating carbohydrates!) Have a great Monday!

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