Jump to content
Jambands.ca

Drugs now legal if user is employed


Davey Boy 2.0
 Share

Recommended Posts

WASHINGTON, DC— Seeking to "narrow the focus of the drug war to the true enemy," Congress passed a bill legalizing drug use for the gainfully employed Monday.

"Stockbrokers, lawyers, English professors... you're not the problem here," said DEA Administrator Asa Hutchinson at a White House press conference. "If you are paying taxes and keeping your yard tidy, we're not going to hassle you if you come home from a hard day of work and want to enjoy a little pot or blow. But if, on the other hand, you're one of these lazy, shiftless types hanging out on the street all day looking for your next high, we're coming after you."

The new law, which goes into effect May 1, will enable police departments and courts to focus on what Hutchinson called "the real drug offenders."

http://www.theonion.com/onion3811/drugs_now_legal.html

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...