Jimmy_Milbury_Esq Posted February 13, 2004 Report Share Posted February 13, 2004 It was a lovely day in Springfield when the calm was shattered by the awful events of that fateful Summer morning. Unbeknownst to the residents of that fair city, a deadly alien virus had spread throughout the cannabis greenhouse on Moon Colony 3, resulting in mutant pot which turned its victims into giant, lumbering relics of the 60s, a hundred feet high! Born aloft by their new telekinetic powers, the giant space hippies descend up Springfield to infect America's precious bodily fluids with their mutant pot spores! Attack of the Giant Space Hippies Space Space Giant Space Hippie Space Giant Hippie! "Look, dude, it's like a little miniature town, with little ant people!" "You goob, you are totally baked! It's not that they're so small, it's that we're so big!" "Whoa, what a trip! Lets crush them with our giant peace symbols and love beads!" "No! We must use the awesome Power of Pot to transform them into giant space hippies just like us, to sap the nation's will and destroy the American Way!" "Groovy!" Hippie Giant Space Attack Attack Attack Space Attack Hippie Giant Hippie Hippie! Using a 50 foot high bong they had fashioned from an abandoned grain silo, the evil space hippies sent clouds of mutant pot smoke drifting over the town." (cough,cough) Awesome bud, dude." Soon innocent, God-fearing Americans were "turning on" in ways they had never anticipated. (Minnesotan accent) "Gee Swen, all this smoke is making me hungry, but these five pounds of tater tots ought to hit the spot, dontchaknow?" "Quite hogging those tots, eh? Besides, you don't need any more, you've already grown three feet in the last five minutes." (CRACK!) "Oops, there goes the roof!" "Why do I suddenly have an urge to buy a strobe light and listen to the Grateful Dead?" "No, man. I've got these new Phish MP3s I downloaded from the Internet" Hippie Hippie Hippie Hippie Can nothing stop these monsters from inflicting their shameless hedonism, wimpy foreign policy and interminable bongo solos on an innocent public? (Deep Male Voice) "I'll save you!" "Why it's Patriotic Man, back from his Castle of Fortitude!" "You mean his Fortress of Vastness!" "Whatever, dude." Patriotic Man: "I'll stop those hippies with a little help from my friends: The U.S. Army!" Space Space Space Space Meanwhile back in Springfield: "Our giant army of space hippies now numbers in the thousands! No one can stop pot power now!" "No so fast, stoner!" "Too late, Patriotic man! With one puff of our giant space bong, we'll turn you into a giant tree-hugging communist draft dodger like ourselves!" "You loose, deadhead! Thanks to my superhuman strength, I'm able to hold an eight hour air supply clinched in my buttcheeks! Now taste the steely fist of American justice, tofu-boy!" Attack Attack Attack Attack (sounds of fighting: Biff! Bam! Wham!) For over an hour, Patriotic Man battled thousands of the giant space hippies in a battle royal that spooked the livestock- (I think we should thrown in the "Wilbur!" from National Lampoon's own Art Rock Parody here, just to amuse the 5 or 10 people who might get it...) and shook the ground for hundreds of miles around. "Dude, stop moving so fast! My reflexes are baked!" Finally, the sheer number of hippies finally weakened Patriotic Man until he fell into their cannabis-stained clutches. Is this the end for the red white and blue crusader? "Man, you are, like, so dead! I'm going to roll you up and smoke you!" "No so fast, headcase! Look behind you!" "The U.S. Army!" "That's right, psychedelic loser! Get ready for the ultimate bad trip! General Bubblepuppy, fire the Bring Down Ray!" "Oh no, man! Your harshing my buzz!" "Oh my God, my tax return is due tomorrow." (Woman's voice) "I've got cookies to bake!" "I've got to see my Chiropractor!" (Woman's voice) "Oh no, I forgot to have kids!" "My 401K is down over 60% this year!" "Marge! We're out of cupcakes!" As the Bring Down Ray did it's work, the space pot spores died, and the hippies shrunk back to normal size. "Welcome back to the world of responsibilities, hippies! Now get a haircut, and get a real job!" America/Canada was saved yet again thanks to the efforts of Patriotic Man. What have YOU done for your country lately, you rock music listening slacker? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Musicface Posted February 13, 2004 Report Share Posted February 13, 2004 Dude, that's... very... uhh... ...dude. quote: What have YOU done for your country lately, you rock music listening slacker? Well I've been informating people about National Flag Day of Canada! Hah hah, take THAT! Peace, Mr. M. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ggrtrhhrtgg Posted February 13, 2004 Report Share Posted February 13, 2004 hahahhahahahahahahaahhaahhahahahahahahah hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah (the break was me falling off the chair.. mr.music..brilliant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paisley Posted February 13, 2004 Report Share Posted February 13, 2004 oh oh Crazy Joe Devola Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jared Posted February 13, 2004 Report Share Posted February 13, 2004 that was too funny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimmy_Milbury_Esq Posted February 15, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 15, 2004 Thats what you get when you pass out around crazy Joe,you lose at least two dreads. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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