meggo Posted February 25, 2004 Report Share Posted February 25, 2004 i found this amusing. personally i'm a beer or red wine person. slushy fruity drinks are nice in summer but they also bring bees... i'm allergic to bees... so, not so much. hope somebody else out there gets a kick outta this. > > > > > A recent magazine survey, interviewed fifty > > > > > bartenders and they were asked > > > > > if they could identify a customers personality on > > > > > what drinks they ordered. > > > > > > > > > > Although interviewed separately, they concurred on > > > > > almost all counts. > > > > > > > > > > The results: > > > > > > > > > > WOMEN WHO DRINK: > > > > > > > > > > Drink : Beer. > > > > > Personality : Casual, low maintenance; down to > > > > > earth. > > > > > Approach : Challenge her to a game of pool. > > > > > > > > > > Drink : Cocktails or Blender drinks with > > > > > umbrella. > > > > > Personality : Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a pain in > > > > > the ass. > > > > > Approach : Avoid her, unless you want to be her > > > > > cabin boy. > > > > > > > > > > Drink : Mixed drinks - no umbrellas eg; Scotch > > > > > and dry > > > > > Personality : Mature, has picky taste; knows what > > > > > she wants. > > > > > Approach : If she wants you, she'll send YOU a > > > > > drink. . . . . > > > > > > > > > > Drink : Water > > > > > Personality : Pretentious and is looking for a > > > > > serious relationship. > > > > > Approach : Don't. > > > > > > > > > > Drink : Wine - (bottled not 4 litre cask) > > > > > Personality : Conservative and classy, > > > > > sophisticated. > > > > > Approach : Try and weave Paris and clothing into > > > > > the conversation. > > > > > > > > > > Drink : Bacardi Breezer, Lemon Ruskie, West > > > > > Coast Cooler, etc > > > > > Personality : Easy; thinks she is trendy and > > > > > sophisticated actually has > > > > > absolutely no clue. > > > > > Approach : Make her feel smarter than she > > > > > is...and you're in. > > > > > > > > > > Drink : Baileys. > > > > > Personality : Annoying voice, bit of a tart. > > > > > Approach : Stand close and mention the alley next > > > > > to the pub. > > > > > > > > > > Drink : Shots and Slammers (Tequila, Vodka, > > > > > Aftershock etc.) > > > > > Personality : Hangs around with male work pals or > > > > > looking to get > > > > > drunk...and naked. > > > > > Approach : Easiest hit in the pub. Nothing to do > > > > > but wait. > > > > > > > > > > IF MEN DRINK > > > > > > > > > > As always, very simple and clear cut. . . . . > > > > > > > > > > Cider : He's probably under-aged and wants to get > > > > > laid. . . . . > > > > > > > > > > Cheap Domestic Beer : He's poor / student and wants > > > > > to get laid. > > > > > > > > > > Premium Local Beer : He likes good beer and wants to > > > > > get laid. . > > > > > > > > > > Bitter : He's old, he likes good beer and wants to > > > > > get laid. . . > > > > > > > > > > Imported Beer : He likes expensive beer and wants to > > > > > get laid . > > > > > > > > > > Guinness : The man is a rapist and will get laid one > > > > > way or another. > > > > > > > > > > Water : He just threw up and is trying to wash the > > > > > taste out of his mouth > > > > > and still wants to get laid . . . . > > > > > > > > > > Wine : He's hoping that the wine thing will give him > > > > > a Sophisticated image > > > > > and help him get laid. . . . . > > > > > > > > > > Vodka or Brandy : Extremely horny hound, would shag > > > > > a warm scarf... > > > > > Desperate to get laid. . . . . > > > > > > > > > > Port : Thinks he's sophisticated, secretly likes men > > > > > and wants to get laid. > > > > > . . . . > > > > > > > > > > Whisky : He doesn't give two $hits about anything > > > > > and will hit anyone who > > > > > will get in his way of getting laid. . . . . > > > > > > > > > > Jack Daniels : Not as masculine as the whisky > > > > > drinker, knows all about > > > > > feminine activities (knitting, crochet etc.) to > > > > > weasel himself into getting > > > > > laid. . . . > > > > > > > > > > Rum or Tequila : Likes fighting almost as much as > > > > > getting laid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purple foot Posted February 25, 2004 Report Share Posted February 25, 2004 quote: Guinness : The man is a rapist and will get laid one > > > > > way or another. HA Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meggo Posted February 25, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 25, 2004 yeah.. not exactly "pc".. but i've never been a big fan of the hard-core pc stuff. sometimes it sucks the fun out of life. or maybe, i'm just an ass Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
purple foot Posted February 25, 2004 Report Share Posted February 25, 2004 yeah. like yesterdays redneck thread. (in voice of timmy from south park) "i mean come on" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meggo Posted February 25, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 25, 2004 what's that mean? actually - let's not go there again. i have a feeling i know exactly where it will end up. rock on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greasyfizeek Posted February 25, 2004 Report Share Posted February 25, 2004 i really enjoyed this, thanks meggo! how many girls have i met who are like this??? Drink : Bacardi Breezer, Lemon Ruskie, West Coast Cooler, etc Personality : Easy; thinks she is trendy and sophisticated actually has absolutely no clue. Approach : Make her feel smarter than she is...and you're in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bokonon Posted February 25, 2004 Report Share Posted February 25, 2004 beer drinking mamas rock! although, playing me a game of pool is not much of a challenge, but i will play and your ego will feel good and big! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ggrtrhhrtgg Posted February 26, 2004 Report Share Posted February 26, 2004 first I am a bartender--- so what do I agree with??? Drink : Cocktails or Blender drinks with > > > > > umbrella. > > > > > Personality : Flaky, annoying, dizzy, and a (pain in > > > > > the ass.) --favourite part!! > > > > > Approach : Avoid her, unless you want to be her > > > > > cabin boy. the reason why every bartender said this is because every bartender IS FUCKIN LAZY! haha. and I am a little concerned, cus I drink guinness??!!?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SmellyPants Posted February 26, 2004 Report Share Posted February 26, 2004 i drink it all and iam always a asshole Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buffy420 Posted February 27, 2004 Report Share Posted February 27, 2004 I'm not a drinker but I sure like this poster! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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