CharlieDon'tSurf Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 Consider the following somewhat graphic, yet completely fictional, scenarios and give your thoughts on the outcome:1) Siberian Tiger vs. Grizzly Bear. Who wins?2) 3 Chimpanzees vs. WWF's The Rock & Triple H. Who wins?3) Neil Young, Keith Richards and Pete Townsend on guitar. Who out-jams the others?4) The Mask of Vulcan vs. Daedalus. Who screws up first and dies?I've been at work way too long and this is the only way to make the brain swelling go down....P.S. No animals were harmed in the posting of this message. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gentlemonkey Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 THe only match up that would interest me would be Keith Richards vs. Siberian Tiger.. finally get a chance to see Keith use his finishing move... his breath. Tiger's melt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tonberry Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 What a coincidence. A couple of friends and I made a whole list of fun little fights today at school. Peruse at your own pace:Martha Stuart vs. Leigh Chapel Billy Bob Thorton vs. Jesus The Klu Klux Klan vs. Cobra (From GI Joe fame) David Duchovny vs. Brent Spiner Conan O'Brian vs. Ted Danson Donald Sutherland vs. Kiefer Sutherland Keanu Reeves vs. Jerry Seinfeld Cheryl Blossom vs. Poison Ivy Perry Mason vs. The Baby from "who framed Roger Rabbit." Jon Bon Jovi vs. Rev. M. C. Hammer Angela Landsbury vs. Matlock Tony The Tiger vs. Bill Gates Shirley Maclain vs. Rikki Lake The Incredible Hulk vs. Ghandi Cesar Romero vs. Jack Nicholson Pee Wee Herman vs. Howdy Doody Carl Reiner vs. The Late George Burns Colin Powel vs. The Fonz Oprah Winfrey vs. Mr Peabody Pat Boone vs. Bella Lugosi Orson Welles vs. Marlon Brando Paul Anka vs. Jeff Foxworthy Homer Simpson vs. Alfred Hitchcock Jerry Lewis vs. Tina Turner Shirley Manson vs. Clark Gable Bette Midler vs. Monica Lewinsky George Bush vs. George "Dubbya" Bush Margaret Atwood vs. Laurence Olivier Hamburgler vs. Sugarbear Subway vs. Quinzo's Elmo vs. Grover Prince William Vs. The People's Republic Of China Pamela Anderson vs. A Velociraptor Johnny Depp vs. Antonio Benderes Sadaam Hussein vs. Tony Blair Cher vs. A giant, pregnant lobster Bob Dole vs. Captain America Mr. Ed, the talking horse vs. Babe the PigI thought it was a coincidence... anyhoo... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieDon'tSurf Posted May 23, 2002 Author Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 Quite the coinkidink I must admit Tonberry!I would also include:Tammy Faye Baker vs. Howdy Doody Billy Ray Cyrus vs. a ShopVac William Burroughs vs. George Burns Mayonaisse vs. Miracle WhipEwww....the carnage! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubberdinghy Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 Quiznos takes it, hands down!!!and of course Leigh Chapel, Marthas a wimp! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tonberry Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 I think, for my money, the best one would be Elmo vs. Grover. Just think of the colours and the long, spindley puppet limbs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
h Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 grover would trounce himi really dont like the burroughs vs burns - where did that come from?? bukouski vs robert downey jrif keith richards ever got into trouble he'd just pull one of the keys from his head and use it to port back to his own dimension Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doubleB Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 His breath... hahahahahaha, good one GM... fuck we miss you. This should start a fight..... Trey vs Jerry (trey ..... TKO) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Low Roller Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 Phil comes in with a steel chair and takes both 'dem bitches out. He then announces that he's tired of them both and introduces his new manager, Dr. Dre. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieDon'tSurf Posted May 23, 2002 Author Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 Burroughs vs. Burns came from deep within my subconscious. Probably sort of a little pay back for Billy Burroughs and George Burns seems like the right guy to do it... Maybe Shirley Temple would be a better opponent for Burroughs, I dunno. Those crazy curls and the incessant humming of 'Good Ship Lollipop' would too much for anyone... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 Trey would go first on his madcapped soloing notlisteningtoanyonebut wishinghecouldwatchhimselfinamirror , headbobbing, arms flailing, hair flying solo for 20 minutes, everyone would go "WOW!" and Jerry would wipe the floor with him with his first note..............he wouldnt need to play another one. 1 punch knockout! Quiznos wins hand down as does Stinkwalletits all about the heart and solo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
treyter Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 yeah Trey's 4 licks would be done in the first 2 seconds, and old uncle Jerry would laugh his ass off, then proceed to teach young skywalker a lesson. there's a famous quote from santana about the dead and going onstage with them...something about you having to really, really know your shit, because those guys got more licks than jenna jameson....or something.then they'd do a song where they'd both have to sing and only one would be able to do it. the little leaguer has no idea how to, and certaintly wouldn't dream of stepping up to that plate with that toothpick in his hands, when barry bonds just knocked out a grand slam.it would still have been one of the best things we could have ever seen though...young trey getting up and ripping it onstage with the dead....THE WATCHTOWER!! GEEZUZ MAN!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phakinit_thru Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 Quick.... H vs Makisupapoliceman at Topic : The new site....see it live folks... be the first to post the winner... (Being the first seems to mean something here.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phakinit_thru Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 ohoh... Now H is reachin' out for the threesome... Charlie is woozy... film at eleven. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted May 23, 2002 Report Share Posted May 23, 2002 Yeah Treyter, that Santana thingy is him warning Popper before he went onstage with them. He said something along the lines of, dont use all your best stuff right away. The Dead make you feel like you can just bust it all out immediately. If you do that, they will tear you to shreads and you will be up there, lost....... Which kinda sucked in the end, Santana scared the be-geezuz out of him and he was too laid back while playing Wang Dang Doodle. Popper is the first one to admit that and I have him quoted in a book somewhere about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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