rubberdinghy Posted May 4, 2005 Report Share Posted May 4, 2005 got this as a forward!! gotta love mom'sA couple decides to go for a meal on their anniversary and after some deliberation decide on their local Chinese restaurant.They peruse the menu and finally agree to share the chef's special chicken surprise.The waiter brings over the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot. Just as the wife is about to start serving the meal, the lid of the pot rises a tiny amount and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down."Did you see that?" she asks her husband. He didn't, so she asks him to look in the pot.He reaches for it and again the lid rises, and again two beady little eyes look around before the lid firmly slams back down.Rather perturbed he calls the waiter over, explains what is happening and demands an explanation."Well sir", says the waiter, "What did you order?""We both chose the same", he replied, "the chicken surprise""Oh I do apologise, this is my fault" says the waiter, "I've brought you the Peeking Duck"ZING!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatpatguy Posted May 4, 2005 Report Share Posted May 4, 2005 try this one on for size:Q: What's Brown and Sticky?A: A Stick!bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! I love it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TomFoolery Posted May 4, 2005 Report Share Posted May 4, 2005 Ugh x 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatpatguy Posted May 4, 2005 Report Share Posted May 4, 2005 Ugh x 2 but I bet you tell to at least three people today Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bradm Posted May 4, 2005 Report Share Posted May 4, 2005 try this one on for size:Q: What's Brown and Sticky?A: A Stick!bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! I love it!What about [color:green]green sticks?Aloha,Brad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thatpatguy Posted May 4, 2005 Report Share Posted May 4, 2005 What about [color:green]green sticks?Aloha,Bradwhy do you hate America? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SaggyBalls Posted May 5, 2005 Report Share Posted May 5, 2005 pat...i've been telling that joke forever...well here's one for ya...what's brown and sounds like a bell?? - DUNG!what do you do with a blue whale?cheer him up!(booo) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Del Posted May 5, 2005 Report Share Posted May 5, 2005 They should call this thread "Shittiest Jokes Ever" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Del Posted May 5, 2005 Report Share Posted May 5, 2005 How many deadheads does it take to screw in a light bulb? 40,000. One to change the lightbulb, 499 to tape the event, 15,000 to dance and twirl in ecstasy, 5000 to sit and grumble that "they used to change 'em better in the old days", 5,000 to wander around outside with one finger in the air, calling out "doses", "da kine", "veggie burritos", "groovy dyes", "guats", "spare change", "gas/motel/food money", 4000 to wander around outside dancing at the cars with the tunes blasting from the tape decks, lining up at the balloon trucks, 100 scalpers selling fake bulbs, 400 state/local/federal officers looking for all the above...oh, yeah, and 10,000 to follow the old burned out one to the next town. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazlo Posted May 5, 2005 Report Share Posted May 5, 2005 Two dudes go hiking in the woods when they came to a fork in the trail. They decided to split up and meet up in a few hours. A few hours passed and one hiker says to the other,"So what did you see?" "I came across this stream and followed it fro awhile until I came to this beautiful waterfall.What did you see?""Well I came across these railroad tracks and followed them for awhile then I came across this beautiful woman tied to them. I untied her and we had sex in every position possible""That's amazing what luck so did you get a blow job?""No, couldn't find her head." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PalacePrincess Posted May 5, 2005 Report Share Posted May 5, 2005 what's fuzzy, green, has 4 legs, and if it falls out of a tree on you, will kill you? . . . . . . . ............ a pool table! (courtesy of the *five feet of fury*... she has the worst jokes EVER!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meggo Posted May 6, 2005 Report Share Posted May 6, 2005 They should call this thread "Shittiest Jokes Ever" ohhhh del. my favourite hater. actually that post was the only one that made me laugh out loud. heh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hartamophone Posted May 6, 2005 Report Share Posted May 6, 2005 Q. What did the Phish Head say when he ran out of drugs?A. "Man, these guys really DO suck." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
backbacon Posted May 6, 2005 Report Share Posted May 6, 2005 ohhhh del. my favourite hater. Great quote! gotta love him though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Schwa. Posted May 6, 2005 Report Share Posted May 6, 2005 gotta love him though! meh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Del Posted May 6, 2005 Report Share Posted May 6, 2005 gotta love him though! meh.Right back at ya brah... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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