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Alt qotd 07.09.03


TonyRage

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Which dead rockstar (excluding Jerry Garcia - too obvious) would you like to ressurect, how would you do it, and why?

For me, I'd like to bring back Robert Johnson. He was young when he died and had already done so much for music and guitar techniques and style, and I think he would probably lead the way in a new blues explosion. Plus he sold his soul to the devil, so getting him back would only be a matter of bartering someone else's soul for his. I'd say we offer George W. in exchange and then it's like having your birthday on christmas.

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People, this is a thre part question and I must say, most of you are failing the most important part. How would you bring these people back to life? Would you import their soul into newborns? Would you use voodoo? Let's get creative here. For example:

I would have to say to get Jim Morrison back (not that we want him back), you'd have to appeal to his vanity. We could build a giant shrine and make sacrifices of virgins and drugs until he arose. This is what I'm talking about.

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My choice would be Frank Zappa. He died during a particularly creative period (e.g., "The Yellow Shark", "Civilization Phaze III", etc.), and at quite a young age.

I figure that, if his soul survived in Zappa form, he's a prime candidate to come back to earth. If there's a Hell and he's in it, he's likely annoying Satan with unplayable melodies and rhythms (24 equally-spaced beats over a bar of 23/8 time? what?), and generally being a Hellish curmudgeon. If there's Heaven and he's in it, Jehovah probably wants to get rid of him for similar reasons, and because Zappa's pointing out all the stupid stuff associated with Judeo-Christian religions and the ugly stuff being done in their name.

OK, we want him back, and those in charge of where he is want him back, so how do we do it? Simple: we swap his soul and spirit for that of someone we can afford to get rid of: Fred Durst.

All of a sudden, Durst & Co. would start producing interesting, intelligent, fun, good music, written with passion for the music's sake alone, not out of a whiny, MTV-approved, mock-anger ("I'm VP of a multi-million record label and I hate everything") point of view. With his current fan base, at least the initial releases would get heard, and if Durst started speaking intelligently about important topics (like the RIAA, and DRM), some of the kids might just listen and be provoked into positive actions, as oppsed to wearing red caps and standing around posing in sweat-shop-made clothing and driving around in SUVs, believing that growing up in suburbia is a horrible existence.

Aloha,

Brad

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