Davey Boy 2.0

Loved Molina's lumbering base running, btw. When he made it home after that not-so-deep sac fly the bench was killing themselves laughing

'A Queensland man faces criminal charges after allegedly tattooing a 40cm-long penis onto his mate's back. Police have charged a 21-year-old man from Bundamba, near Ipswich, with two counts of assault occasioning bodily harm and one offence relating to the public safety act. He will appear in Ipswich Magistrates Court on November 15. It will cost the 25-year-old alleged victim about $2000 to remove the lewd tattoo. It depicts a 40cm-long image of a penis and a misspelled slogan implying the man is gay. Police said the pair had a disagreement before the tattooing. 'Ipswich Detective Constable Paul Malcolm said the victim was mortified by what happened to him. "The victim wasn't interested (in a tattoo) at first but he was talked into it and he said he wanted a Yin and Yang symbol with some dragons," Detective Malcolm told the Queensland Times today. "The bloke started doing the tattoo and there was another bloke standing there watching saying, 'Mate, it's looking really good.' He was told not to go out into the sun and not to show anyone for a few weeks. When he got home he showed it to the person he lives with and she said: 'I dont think it's the tattoo you were after'" - theage.com.au.

I don't think it was a typo, Brad- look at her avatar!

collige virgo rosas

[color:#cccccc]'bet you say that to all the guys (?)

he'd capture the imagination of a lot of phanners with a "Free N2O on every corner" platform

Wonder what this guy would do to that billboard

well i concealed them on your lower extremities anyway, so look away

Looks like he's mixed up Darth Vader's TIE fighter with a regular TIE fighter though

I think we should start calling your casserole dish the Double Down

that's why i showed restraint

If you happened to notice 3 women sitting together in their 50s, giggling a lot and acting generally silly, you've probably caught a glimpse of CatPhish's Mon & aunts, D Funk

....and/or MSG

I heard Real already lined up an offer for that welsh wanker

nope, not even close

my hand appears to be moving

2nd'd

I may or may not be masturbating right now!

BEPPI CROSARIOL decanter@globeandmail.com Much of what passes for wisdom in food-and-wine pairing has always struck me as fishy. I'm talking such classic matchups as red Burgundy with creamy cheese (ghastly), strawberries with Champagne (a waste of the latter) and Thai food with beer (a surefire way to ruin two good things). To question entrenched standards is to invite scorn. Then I found a breath of fresh sommelier air in Francois Chartier. Mr. Chartier, a Quebecker, is the author of Taste Buds and Molecules: The Art and Science of Food with Wine , published last year in French and just released in English by McClelland & Stewart. I wrote about him last summer as his book, the culmination of two decades of chemistry research and experimentation, began causing a stir in culinary circles. He's a practitioner of so-called molecular gastronomy, the movement pioneered by Spanish chef Ferran Adria. Occasionally found collaborating with Mr. Adria, the 45-year-old ex-sommelier has extended that scientific approach to the world of drink. Rather than relying on the cue of regional association - Epoisses cheese from the Burgundy region with red Burgundy, say - he looks to aromatic compounds found in foods and beverages to come up with what he believes are far more harmonious pairings. Like me, he finds the Epoisses-Burgundy marriage "terrible." Try it yourself if you don't mind wasting an expensive Chambolle-Musigny. Pay attention to the way the stinky, creamy cheese annihilates the delicate pinot noir with its mouldy flavour and pasty texture. Mr. Chartier lived in Burgundy in the 1990s and would recoil when the two were served together. "Each time I would say, 'The red wine is finished, it's dead with the cheese,'" he told me over the phone. Mr. Chartier theorizes that the time-honoured combination was the spawn of historical necessity rather than attention to flavour synergy. Most Burgundians, after all, had no access to - and likely had too much regional pride to entertain - more suitable beverages, such as Belgian beer. After garnering best innovative food book prize at the 2010 Gourmand World Cookbook Awards in Paris this year, Taste Buds and Molecules now is rocking a wider audience of English readers. I asked Mr. Chartier for a few iconoclastic alternatives to standard Western food-and-beverage pairings. I plan to clip this article and paste it on my fridge, where I keep my Epoisses stored safely away from my red Burgundy. *** Bloomy cheeses Conventional pairing: red Burgundy. New pairing: oak-aged chardonnay from the New World. Reason: Diacetyl, found in the cheese, helps give butter and cheese its flavour, and oaky chardonnays taste buttery. Blue cheeses Conventional pairing: vintage port. New pairings: Sauternes, late-harvest gewurztraminer, fino or manzanilla sherry, or New World oaky chardonnay. Reason: a host of aromatic molecules and fatty acids that resonate with the wines. Port remains a good alternative, but try a relatively young, 15-year-old vintage. Roast pork Conventional pairing: light-bodied red. New pairing: white wine aged on its lees (yeast sediment left over from fermentation), such as a roussanne from southern France, or an oak-aged white, such as a full-bodied California chardonnay. Reason: Pork is rich in lactones and so are the wines. Braised beef Conventional pairings: Barolo (a tannic, high-acid red from Italy) or, in the case of boeuf bourguignon , red Burgundy. New pairing: rich, voluptuous reds, such as grenache-syrah-mourvedre blends from Australia, or an Italian Amarone. Reason: The wines' velvety texture will harmonize with the rich, saucy meat. Lamb Conventional pairing: cabernet sauvignon. New pairing: grenache-syrah-mourvedre blends from the Languedoc-Roussillon or Rhone Valley regions of southern France. Reason: Lamb shares aromatic compounds found in thyme; many southern French reds display notes of herbs. If the lamb is cooked with rosemary, try riesling; the pine-scented herb and wine both contain terpenes. Sushi Conventional pairing: sake. New pairing: semi-sweet riesling, such as a German spatlese. Reason: "Sushi is complex," Mr. Chartier said. "There are a lot of different things in a sushi dinner - pickled ginger, wasabi, soy sauce. The best wine to manage all of that is a sweet wine, but not too sweet." Alternative: wheat beer. Smoked salmon Conventional pairings: Champagne or whisky. New pairing: oak-aged whites, especially oloroso or amontillado sherry. Reason: Smoked fish develops aromatic compounds found in charred wood barrels. Curries Conventional pairing (at least in Britain): lager. New pairing: aged white wine, such as a vin jaune from the Jura region of France or a Sauternes from Bordeaux or tokay from Hungary. Reason: As whites age in bottle (after, say, five years), they begin to develop the flavour of sotolon, a highly aromatic compound found in curry. Spicy food Conventional pairing: beer or cold water. New pairing: sweet or high-alcohol whites, such as California viognier or riesling.Reason: Carbonation fuels the fire, while sugar and alcohol (though ideally not over 14.5 per cent) tame it. "You can't drink water, you cannot drink an acidic beverage, you cannot drink carbonated beverages," Mr. Chartier said. Alternative: sweet Nigori sake. Pizza Conventional pairing: Italian red such as Chianti. New pairing: Depends on the toppings, but if you like green peppers, a cabernet franc such as a Chinon or Bourgueil from France's Loire Valley. Reason: The bell pepper and the wine are high in herbal compounds known as pyrazines.

please tell me you fried the phatty chicken fingers

KANSAS CITY, Mo. - A 300-pound (136-kilogram) chimpanzee that broke free from its chains has been captured after briefly wandering around a Kansas City neighbourhood and smashing out the window of a police car. Police Capt. Rich Lockhart tells The Kansas City Star the department got a call about noon Tuesday that a primate was on the loose a few miles (kilometres) from the Kansas City Zoo. Lockhart says the ape was actually a pet that escaped from its chains. Lockhart says efforts to shoot the animal, named Sueko, with a tranquilizer dart failed. The chimp climbed on a patrol car and struck the passenger-side window with its fist before running off. It's owner was eventually able to coax it into a cage with a large sandwich purchased at KFC. Lockhart says the owner has been cited for having a dangerous animal within city limits.