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http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/08/23/eveningnews/main3199062.shtml

Letters Reveal Mother Teresa's Secret

Book Of Iconic Nun's Letters Shows She Was Tormented By Her Doubts In Her Faith

(CBS) In life, Mother Teresa was an icon — for believers — of God's work on Earth. Her ministry to the poor of Calcutta was a world-renowned symbol of religious compassion. She was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.

In a rare interview in 1986, Mother Teresa told CBS News she had a calling, based on unquestioned faith.

"They are all children of God, loved and created by the same heart of God," she said.

But now, it has emerged that Mother Teresa was so doubtful of her own faith that she feared being a hypocrite, reports CBS News correspondent Mark Phillips.

In a new book that compiles letters she wrote to friends, superiors and confessors, her doubts are obvious.

Shortly after beginning work in Calcutta's slums, the spirit left Mother Teresa.

"Where is my faith?" she wrote. "Even deep down… there is nothing but emptiness and darkness... If there be God — please forgive me."

Eight years later, she was still looking to reclaim her lost faith.

"Such deep longing for God… Repulsed, empty, no faith, no love, no zeal," she said.

As her fame increased, her faith refused to return. Her smile, she said, was a mask.

"What do I labor for?" she asked in one letter. "If there be no God, there can be no soul. If there be no soul then, Jesus, You also are not true."

"These are letters that were kept in the archbishop's house," the Rev. Brian Kolodiejchuk told Phillips.

The letters were gathered by Rev. Kolodiejchuk, the priest who's making the case to the Vatican for Mother Teresa's proposed sainthood. He said her obvious spiritual torment actually helps her case.

"Now we have this new understanding, this new window into her interior life, and for me this seems to be the most heroic," said Rev. Kolodiejchuk.

According to her letters, Mother Teresa died with her doubts. She had even stopped praying, she once said.

The church decided to keep her letters, even though one of her dying wishes was that they be destroyed. Perhaps now we know why.

© MMVII, CBS Interactive Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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The church decided to keep her letters, even though one of her dying wishes was that they be destroyed. Perhaps now we know why.

Meh.

Christopher Hitchens stuff aside... the fact that words be there that she ever doubted her faith, something beautiful appears. Namely, a lifetime of devotion to people in need, driven in spite of itself. That she kept herself there, even despite the fact that she became a living icon, is not a little impressive; I say that, having seen a little bit of the misery in Calcutta, if only for a couple of days (and here I am, in the comfort of a well-tended village in Ontario, knowing that Calcutta persists in its wildness at this very instant, and it only keeps compounding).

The moment in the Gospels where Jesus himself loses faith in the whole project? Ain't no joke - if you want to take the story fwiw. When you see what it can actually do with itself... humanity scares the shit out of me.

Excuse me while I go find my cat.

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:D !

On that note....

William Ralph Inge

THE INDICTMENT AGAINST CHRISTIANITY

(1917)

No thinking man can deny that this war has grievously stained the reputation of Europe. Even if the verdict of history confirms the opinion that the conspiracy which threw the torch into the powder-magazine was laid by a few persons in one or two countries, and that the unparalleled outrages which have accompanied the conflict were ordered by a small coterie of brutal officers, we cannot forget that these crimes have been committed by the responsible representatives of a civilised European power, and that the nation which they represent has shown no qualms of conscience. That such a calamity, the permanent results of which include a holocaust of European wealth and credit, accumulated during a century of unprecedented industry and ingenuity, the loss of innumerable lives, and the destruction of all the old and honourable conventions which have hitherto regulated the intercourse of civilised nations with each other, in war as well as in peace, should have been possible, is justly felt to be a reproach to the whole continent, and especially to the nations which have taken the lead in its civilisation and culture. The ancient races of Asia, which have never admitted the moral superiority of the West, are keenly interested spectators of our suicidal frenzy. A Japanese is reported to have said, 'We have only to wait a little longer, till Europe has completed her hara kiri.' This is, indeed, what any intelligent observer must think about the present struggle. Just as the feudal barons of England destroyed each other and brought the feudal system to an end in the Wars of the Roses, so the great industrial nations are rending to pieces the whole fabric of modern industrialism, which can never be reconstructed. Mr. Norman Angell was perfectly right in his argument that a European war would be ruinous to both sides. The material objects at stake, such as the control of the Turkish Empire and the African continent, are not worth more than an insignificant fraction of the war-bill. We are witnessing the suicide of a social order, and our descendants will marvel at our madness, as we marvel at the senseless wars of the past.

There has, it is plain, been something fundamentally wrong with European civilisation, and the disease appears to be a moral one. With this conviction it is natural that men should turn upon the official custodians of religion and morality, and ask them whether they have been unfaithful to their trust, or whether it is not rather proved that the faith which they profess is itself bankrupt and incapable of exerting any salutary influence upon human character and action. Christianity stands arraigned at the bar of public opinion. But it is not without significance that the indictment should now be urged with a vehemence which we do not find in the records of former convulsions. It was not generally felt to be a scandal to Christianity that England was at war for 69 years out of the 120 which preceded the battle of Waterloo. Either our generation expected more from Christianity, or it was far more shocked by the sudden outbreak of this fierce war than our ancestors were by the almost chronic condition of desultory campaigning to which they were accustomed. The latter is probably the true reason. The belief in progress, which at the beginning of the industrial revolution was an article of faith, had become a tacitly accepted presupposition of all serious thought; and even those who were dubious about the moral improvement of mankind in other directions, seldom denied that we were more humane and peaceable than our forefathers. The disillusion has struck our self-complacency in its most vital spot. Nothing in our own experience had prepared us for the hideous savagery and vandalism of German warfare, the first accounts of which we received with blank amazement and incredulity. Then, when disbelief was no longer possible, there awoke within us a sense of fear for our homes and women and children—feeling to which modern civilised man had long been a stranger. We had not supposed that the non-combatant population of any European country would ever again be exposed to the horrors of savage warfare. This, much more than the war itself, has made thousands feel that the house of civilisation is built upon the sand, and that Christianity has failed to subdue the most barbarous instincts of human nature. Christians cannot regret that the flagrant contradiction between the principles of their creed and the scenes that have been enacted during the last three years is fully recognised. But the often repeated statement that 'Christianity has failed' needs more examination than it usually receives from those who utter it.

History acquaints us with two kinds of religion, which, though they are not entirely separate from each other, differ very widely in their effects upon conduct and morality. The religio which Lucretius hated, and from which he strangely hoped that the atomistic materialism of Epicurus had finally delivered mankind, has its roots in the sombre and confused superstitions of the savage. Fear, as Statius and Petronius tell us, created the gods of this religion. These deities are mysterious and capricious powers, who exact vengeance for the transgression of arbitrary laws which they have not revealed, and who must be propitiated by public sacrifice, lest some collective punishment fall on the tribe, blighting its crops and smiting its herds with murrain, or giving it over into the hand of its enemies. This religion makes very little attempt to correct the current standard of values. Its rewards are wealth and prosperity; its punishments are calamity in this world and perhaps torture in the next. It is not, however, incapable of moralisation. The wrath of heaven may visit not the innocent violation of some tabu, but cruelty and injustice. In the historical books of the Old Testament, though Uzzah is stricken dead for touching the ark, and the subjects of King David afflicted with pestilence because their ruler took a census of his people, Jehovah is above all things a righteous God, who punishes bloodshed, adultery, and social oppression. So in Greece the Furies pursue the homicide and the perjurer, till the name of his family is clean put out. Herodotus tells us how the family of Glaucus was extinguished because he consulted the oracle of Delphi about an act of embezzlement which he was meditating.

International law was protected by the same fear of divine vengeance. The murder of heralds must by all means be expiated. When the Romans repudiate their 'scrap of paper' with the Samnites, they deliver up to the enemy the officers who signed it, though (with characteristic 'slimness') not the army which the mountaineers had captured and liberated under the agreement. To destroy the temples in an enemy's country was an act of wanton impiety; Herodotus cannot understand the religious intolerance which led the Persians to burn the shrines of Greek gods. Thus religion had a restraining influence in war throughout antiquity, and in the Middle Ages. The Pope, who was believed to hold the keys of future bliss and torment, was frequently, though by no means always, obeyed by the turbulent feudal lords, and often enforced the sanctity of a contract by the threat or the imposition of excommunication and interdict. In order to make these penalties more terrible, the torments of those who died under the displeasure of the Church were painted in the most vivid colours. But in the official and popular Christian eschatology, as in the terrestrial theodicy of the Old Testament, there is little or no moral idealism. The joys or pains of the future life are made to depend, in part at least, on the observance or violation of the moral law, but they are themselves of a kind which the natural man would desire or dread. They are an enhanced, because a deferred, retribution of the same kind which in more primitive religions promises earthly prosperity to the righteous, and earthly calamities to the wicked. Values, positive and negative, are taken nearly as they stand in the estimation of the average man.

But there is another religious tradition, which in Greece was almost separated from the official and national cults, and among the Hebrews was often in opposition to them. The Hebrew prophets certainly proclaimed that 'the history of the world is the judgment of the world,' and often assumed, too crudely as it seems to us, that national calamities are a proof of national transgression; but the whole course of development in prophecy was towards an autonomous morality based on a spiritual valuation of life. Its quarrel with sacerdotalism was mainly directed against the unethical tabu-morality of the priesthood; the revolt was grounded in a lofty moral idealism, which found expression in a half-symbolic vision of a coming state in which might and right should coincide. The apocalyptic prophecies of post-exilic Judaism, which were not based, like some political predictions of the earlier prophets, on a statesmanlike view of the international situation, but on hopes of supernatural intervention, had their roots in visions of a new and better world-order. This aspiration, which had to disentangle itself by degrees from the patriotic dreams of a stubborn and unfortunate race, was projected into the near future, and was mixed with less worthy political ambitions which had a different origin. The prophet always foreshortens his revelation, and generally blends the city of God with a vision of his own country transfigured. We see him doing this even to-day, in his Utopian dreams of social reconstruction.

(Etc.)

Interesting piece - well worth reading the rest (much too long to post here). The argument, as it goes, is that any instutionalised religion is bound to devolve into barbarism, and drag its culture down with it.

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"Christian love" story of the day.

Kinda sad, too, knowing some folks in our town here who'd send their kids there.

Apology for "hurt and pain" at private school

MICHAEL VALPY

September 1, 2007

Ontario's Grenville Christian College, which has closed amid allegations of cult practices, was an emotionally, spiritually and sometimes physically abusive place that caused "hurt and pain" to staff and students, a former senior administrator of the elite private school acknowledged yesterday.

Joan Childs, who worked at the school for more than 30 years, posted a public apology on an Internet message board that former students have been using for more than a year to talk about what they experienced and suffered.

"What was done to people at GCC was very wrong," Ms. Childs wrote. "I was very wrong. And I am so sorry for all the hurt that was caused to each of you by me and by all of us in positions of leadership."

Former students have described a bizarre environment where they were hauled from their beds in the middle of the night to be harangued for hours by staff at so-called light sessions about being sinners.

They have said they were constantly humiliated by staff, and put on "discipline" for months at a time where they were prohibited from attending class or speaking to anyone.

They also have mentioned occasional physical and sexual assaults, and spoken of living in fear and psychological isolation at the school.

Grenville Christian College, which charged up to $35,000 a year for boarders and $17,000 for day students, announced at the end of July that it would not open for the 2007-08 academic year, citing declining enrolment and rising operating costs.

The school had close links until 1997 with the Community of Jesus in Massachusetts, a titular Anglican charismatic group at one time labelled a cult in the U.S. news media.

Subsequently, a new religious group was created at the school called the Community of the Good Shepherd, of which Ms. Childs, whose husband John was a teacher at the school, became leader in 2000.

In an interview, she said she broke away from the school's past actions after God opened her eyes to the wrongs done, and she was helped by a pastor, Kevin Smith, whom she hired to teach at Grenville.

"Originally, we were a very, very sincere group of people who wanted to do God's work. We always remained sincere, wanting to do God's work, but along the line ... we blindly - and I find it embarrassing to say - we blindly got off the track.

"We started off just being too legalistic [in biblical interpretation], but we went way past that to being - and I'm going to have to use the word - emotionally and spiritually and sometimes physically abusive."

She said she tried to show the community where it had gone wrong and she hoped eventually to raise money to provide therapy - she called it restitution - for students and children of staff who had suffered emotional damage, but the community became fractured and dysfunctional, and she and Rev. Smith eventually left the school.

One former student who speaks of having lived in fear and pain at Grenville is Ms. Childs's daughter, Mel Childs McDaniel, 30, now married and living in Philadelphia.

"I've told my husband a number of times I wish there were marks on me because physical abuse is so much more tangible and visible than emotional abuse," she said yesterday.

The school was almost literally two communities, with one group - overseas students and the sons and daughters of wealthy Ontario families - not knowing what was happening to the other group - children with behaviour problems basically dumped at the school by parents who wanted them "fixed" and the children of staff, almost all of whom belonged to the Community of Jesus.

The staff children were treated the most harshly.

Ms. McDaniel said they were removed from their parents without notice and assigned to live with other staff, whom they had to call aunt and uncle - but only when other students were not around - and who could punish them at will.

"At any moment of any day, you could be just swept off your feet, put on discipline, you had to move somewhere [into another family grouping], you couldn't talk to anyone. It was fear. You lived and breathed fear."

At light sessions, she said the staff children were forced to taunt and harangue other staff children for their sins or become targets themselves. They formed no close friendships for fear their friends would denounce them to the school authorities.

"There were a few staff kids who were truly braver souls than me, and fought harder, but the consequences were so severe that they scared the shit out of us. We could just be shipped off to the Community of Jesus [in Massachusetts] at any moment.

"None of it made sense. You couldn't figure it out. But I believed all of it. I believed I was going to hell. I believed everything. As much as we were unhappy, that's all we knew."

Ms. McDaniel said she would not defend or speak on behalf of her mother, but she did stress that her mother had come to understand the psychological hold over staff members that the school authorities and the Community of Jesus exercised.

Ms. Childs, with a sad and remorseful catch in her voice, recalled the words of a hymn she used to sing when she belonged to the Community of Jesus:

"You are wrong, you are wrong,

"No matter what you say or do,

"You'll always be wrong."

Statement of regret

My name is Joan Childs. For those who do not know me, I was on the administration at GCC for many years. I took part in causing so much of the hurt and pain that so many experienced while they were staff, staff kids, and students at GCC. What was done to people at GCC was very wrong. I was very wrong. And I am so sorry for all the hurt that was caused to each of you by me and by all of us in positions of leadership. I pray for God's healing for each and every person who was wounded while at GCC.

A statement of regret posted on an Internet site by Ms. Childs

Further story:

Brockville's local paper was advised not to publish abuse allegations

MICHAEL VALPY

From Saturday's Globe and Mail

September 1, 2007 at 12:59 AM EDT

The staff of Brockville's newspaper knew nearly 20 years ago of allegations of religious cult practices at Grenville Christian College but backed off from publishing an article because of legal threats and sources who changed their minds about allowing their names to be used.

Hunter Grant, former co-publisher of the Brockville Recorder and Times, said Friday that not getting the story into print was his biggest disappointment in the 30 years he ran what was then his family-owned daily.

The paper had assigned a reporter, Mike Moralis, to investigate both the school and the Community of Jesus in Massachusetts with which the school's staff had close ties.

Mr. Grant's own children had attended the school and heard firsthand the stories of bizarre and harsh discipline to which many students were subjected. His daughter Meredith had experienced the so-called light sessions at which students were set on stools in dark rooms while staff yelled at them that they were sinners.

But just before the newspaper was about to publish its findings, members of the school community who previously had agreed to be quoted began telephoning the paper to say their names could not be used. The newspaper's lawyers said that without the names they should not risk publication.

“We had thought that finally the place would become known for what it is . . . [but] virtually every person we interviewed got cold feet, terrified of repercussions against either the kids or the parents, which meant we had no quoted sources to support and verify our claims.â€

And at the same time, Mr. Grant said, the paper received a letter from a major Toronto law firm threatening libel action on behalf of school authorities if any article saw print.

He said he remembered being astonished at how “a quaint little group of people, these Christians†who ran Grenville, could find their way to a high-priced powerful law firm in Toronto.

He was also astounded, he said, by how the school managed to surround itself with lieutenant-governors of Ontario, a former high-ranking diplomat and well-regarded local lawyers who “had absolutely no idea what was going on inside the walls of that institution.â€

“If only people had been willing to be quoted in 1989, allowing Mike's work to be published, maybe some of those damaged could have been spared,†he said.

Hmmm... this is all going to look great for John Tory, who's been making public funding for private (religious) schools one of the main planks in his platform for the next election :) .

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Just occurred to me...
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:D ! This just gets better and better -

O'Brien former board member of 'cult' prep school

6399.jpg

Mayor Larry O'Brien was the secretary of the board of directors of the controversial Grenville Christian College in 2005 and 2006, according to information publicly available on the school's tax returns.

Grenville has become a hotbed of controversy after over 1000 posts were made about the school, which costs up to $35,000 to attend, on a website forum dedicated to "cults."

Former students allege they were interrogated in the middle of the night in dark rooms with lights shining on their faces, so they couldn't see the staff and teachers interrogating them, according to a Globe And Mail cover story Aug 31.

Grenville is closing its doors, the "ecumenical" school announced earlier this summer.

"The past week has been a difficult week," wrote one forum poster claiming to be a former student. "One week away from therapy and I feel like GCC [Grenville Christian College] will haunt me until the day I die. I was thinking about what I would want from GCC if I could take one thing during its closing. I would take the crucifix of Jesus in the small chapel in the stairwell to the highs chool floors. I spent many hours in there during my last year during 'Light Sessions' where they would try to convince me homosexuality was wrong."

The user posted under the alias gayatgcc.

The forum abounds in accusations of the strict policing of sex and sexuality. Many of the accusations are related to alleged incidents from the 1980s and '90s.

Grenville opened in the late '70s as a co-ed Christian school loosely affiliated with the Anglican Church. It's located near Brockville, Ontario. The private school admits kids from the age of six to the end of high school.

As a registered charity, Grenville's annual tax returns, which list the members of their board of directors, are available on the Canada Revenue Agency website.

Calls to the office of the mayor were not immediately returned.

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Later that day....

I've been reading the discussion board of the former students; very heartwarming to see how they've been taking care of one another. It makes what happened to them all that much more sad, and shows the people who did it to be that much more sick and twisted.

I was part of this subculture for a while, but I'm so thankful that I was never in so deep.

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  • 3 weeks later...

The "public" are stoopid. They're getting dumber as each year goes by too. I don't get it. In an age where information is available so easily, they choose not to inform themselves. The internet gets used by the public for Facebook, porn, music and gaming. There are so many news sources out there that don't follow party lines, or gov't pressure.

The fear-mongering that is happening right now with Iran and its president is baffling. Read some comments on news sites. People believe that Iran is now linked to 9/11 and that they all want kill Americans! The public know diddly-squat about Iran and its people (i'm not saying that i'm an expert by any means, but I want to learn before jumping to conclusions). I am wayyyy more concerned about the actions of Dubya and his pack affecting my life than that of Iran.

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  • 2 weeks later...
They're getting dumber as each year goes by too

I think it would be difficult to demonstrate that. It smacks of the social conservative 'everything was better in the 50s when there was no social corruption .. everything and everyone has gotten worse' delusion. That fantasy happy place of times gone by that we just have to - HAVE TO - reclaim.

Are people really any dumber then they were in 1997? 1987? 1887? I don't buy it.

But I do love the last pic :)

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Nothing good ever came out of naming your kid Oral:

Scandal mires Oral Roberts University

Televangelist's adult children indulged in wild spending, relationships with underage boys, lawsuit alleges

October 05, 2007

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

TULSA, Okla. – Twenty years ago, televangelist Oral Roberts said he was reading a spy novel when God appeared to him and told him to raise $8 million for Roberts' university, or else he would be ``called home."

Now, his son, Oral Roberts University president Richard Roberts, says God is speaking again, telling him to deny lurid allegations in a lawsuit that threatens to engulf this 44-year-old Bible Belt college in scandal.

Richard Roberts is accused of illegal involvement in a local political campaign and lavish spending at donors' expense, including numerous home remodelling projects, use of the university jet for his daughter's senior trip to the Bahamas, and a red Mercedes convertible and a Lexus SUV for his wife, Lindsay.

She is accused of dropping tens of thousands of dollars on clothes, awarding nonacademic scholarships to friends of her children and sending scores of text messages on university-issued cell phones to people described in the lawsuit as "underage males."

At a chapel service this week on the 5,300-student campus known for its 18-metre-tall bronze sculpture of praying hands, Roberts said God told him: "We live in a litigious society. Anyone can get mad and file a lawsuit against another person whether they have a legitimate case or not. This lawsuit . . . is about intimidation, blackmail and extortion."

San Antonio televangelist John Hagee, a member of the ORU board of regents, said the university's executive board "is conducting a full and thorough investigation."

Colleagues fear for the reputation of the university and the future of the Roberts' ministry, which grew from Southern tent revivals to one of the most successful evangelical empires in the country, hauling in tens of millions of dollars in contributions a year. The university reported nearly $76 million in revenue in 2005, according to the IRS.

Oral Roberts is 89 and lives in California. He holds the title of chancellor, but the university describes him as semi-retired, and his son presides over day-to-day operations on the campus, which had a modern, space-age design when it was built in the early 1960s but now looks dated, like Disney's Tomorrowland.

The allegations are contained in a lawsuit filed Tuesday by three former professors. They sued ORU and Roberts, alleging they were wrongfully dismissed after reporting the school's involvement in a local political race.

Richard Roberts, according to the suit, asked a professor in 2005 to use his students and university resources to aid a county commissioner's bid for Tulsa mayor. Such involvement would violate state and federal law because of the university's nonprofit status. Up to 50 students are alleged to have worked on the campaign.

The professors also said their dismissals came after they turned over to the board of regents a copy of a report documenting moral and ethical lapses on the part of Roberts and his family. The internal document was prepared by Stephanie Cantese, Richard Roberts' sister-in-law, according to the lawsuit.

An ORU student repairing Cantese's laptop discovered the document and later provided a copy to one of the professors.

It details dozens of alleged instances of misconduct. Among them:

– A longtime maintenance employee was fired so that an underage male friend of Mrs. Roberts could have his position.

– Mrs. Roberts – who is a member of the board of regents and is referred to as ORU's "first lady" on the university's website – frequently had cell-phone bills of more than $800 per month, with hundreds of text messages sent between 1 a.m. to 3 a.m. to ``underage males who had been provided phones at university expense."

– The university jet was used to take one daughter and several friends on a senior trip to Orlando, Fla., and the Bahamas. The $29,411 trip was billed to the ministry as an "evangelistic function of the president."

– Mrs. Roberts spent more than $39,000 at one Chico's clothing store alone in less than a year and had other accounts in Texas and California. She also repeatedly said, "As long as I wear it once on TV, we can charge it off." The document cites inconsistencies in clothing purchases and actual usage on TV.

– Mrs. Roberts was given a white Lexus SUV and a red Mercedes convertible by ministry donors.

– University and ministry employees are regularly summoned to the Roberts' home to do the daughters' homework.

– The university and ministry maintain a stable of horses for exclusive use by the Roberts' children.

– The Roberts' home has been remodelled 11 times in the past 14 years.

Tim Brooker, one of the professors who sued, said he fears for the university's survival if certain changes aren't made.

"All over that campus, there are signs up that say, `And God said, build me a university, build it on my authority, and build it on the Holy Spirit,"' Brooker said. "Unfortunately, ownership has shifted."

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Yeah, I doubt that we've gotten any more stupid over time, but we have certainly gotten better at doing harm to one another and the planet, and that's not good.

We've just developed more efficient tools :)

Hamilton, thanks for the link and the post. I've always distrusted the Roberts family, partially because of the company they keep, partially because anyone with a charismatic 'healing' TV program trips my BS alarm. Interesting also the source of the allegations being (if indirectly) Stephanie Cantese. Lesson: be very careful around your in-laws.

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