Lazlo

I thought I might have been the only one, excluded for my crimes against humanity.

I'd only get that shirt so I could burn it. I hated that fuckin' show. I'd sooner bore a hole through my head with slowly dripping water than kill my last few brain cells on that crap.

I used to have a cat but it got old and died so I took to the taxidermist and had its asshole enlarged.

I really love all animals but Guineas are a favourite.

Why? Because they fit just right?

So what does the cat look like? Is it male or female? Long or short hair?

FUCK OFF!! It's mine.

happy birthday to the woman of my dreams!!

I thought you dreamed of dudes.

Happy Birthday Smelly Melly

The correct medical term is "taint". Because it ain't ass and it ain't dick

I once got a nasty e-mail from imageshack

Anyone want to save it?

Stick in the freezer and I'll grab it next time up.

I appreciate Lazlo a little more each day. He's able to insult everyone on this board equally, without even using the purple font. Way to go, dick head!

Now, if I could only figure out a way to get laid from it.

Bullshit. You can't play guitar.

selfish: Caring supremely or unduly for one's self; regarding one's own comfort, advantage, etc, in disregard, or at the expence, of those of others.

Gee, your attitude seems pretty selfish to me.

Martha Stewart has or had a apprentice TV show? News to me. What sorta wingnut would watch that? (aside from Lazlo)

I watched it twice just to get an impression of when it might hit the wall. The apprentices are all self-important douches and Martha is simply a bitch.

This sounds like a real train wreck but not just any train wreck. I invision a plane flying into a bridge as the train is crossing and that train falling hundreds of feet onto an ocean liner which then sinks and destroys the Lost City of Atlantis.

I would kick some serious ass on that Martha Stewart Apprentice deal. I can make a pipe cleaner egg carton caterpillar that would eat your fuckin' socks.

It's not important what kind of camera you get, what is important is that you don't take and definitely don't post any pictures of yourself. The kids around here have weak stomachs.

Play it with the volume off and it looks like Steve practicing his cock sucking technique.

I said it was a good show, I never said I liked you or the rest of the band.

When this dude kicks the bucket we'll have a real travesty on our hands.

Hey Esau...

Erich and I went hunting for good peices of wood for basking this weekend while we were in Muskoka. I know that I have to boil the wood in a bleach solution and then bake it but I was wondering if you knew if Poplar wood is okay for reptiles?? Also it is super hard to get the bark off so if we sand it well before we boil and bake do you know if the bark would harm him?

DO NOT BOIL OR BAKE THE BLEACH unless very diluded or you have an assortment of gas-masks.

Fuck it. What do I care. Boil away and add some ammonia while your at it.

I will try to give you the name of your mystery recipient by november 12, 2005.

What's the hold up?

Good show. Some of the best guitar faces I've seen in awhile. Somebody definitely thinks they're a rock star.

Hey Lazlo,

I'm personally way less offended when you use your hands for what they were designed for -- wanking yourself off; why deny yourself the [color:purple]'love' during the time it takes to search for and post such offensive images?

If those pictures are so offensive then why are we forced to learn about such historical events at some point in our education? The shit happened and is happening, you gonna hide in your magic bubble and pretend it's not and didn't? P-shaw!

And hey. I did after all put it to music.

And what makes you think I can't jerk my gerkin and surf the web at the same time?

Actually I just dip my nards in chocolate sauce and let the dog go to town.

In my opinion Oprahs the worst thing there.

Have I ever let you down?