rubberdinghy Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 a turkey baster isn't really a sex toyThat's what she said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubberdinghy Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 When your wife says she's getting her mom a facial for Christmas...Don't tell her you can give her one for free. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorgnor Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 unless she's hot... then give'er. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchoulia Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 This thread is pure gold.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
timouse Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 When your wife says she's getting her mom a facial for Christmas...Don't tell her you can give her one for free.:::: repetatedly hits self in head to remove sudden disturbing imagery, not easy while laughing ::::: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 sometimes she needs to drink @ 10:11am when she's in for a long hard day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ollie Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 When your wife says she's getting her mom a facial for Christmas...Don't tell her you can give her one for free.Whoa! Someone's working blue! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorgnor Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 If she works nights just stay away from her afterwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorgnor Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 If she's a nurse, expect no sympathy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 can't get a date get a nurse Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted October 31, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 sometimes she needs to drink @ 10:11am when she's in for a long hard day But if it aint 2 fingers worth, it aint worthy mentioning.........that'swhatshesaid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 Jesus Barrett, that reminds me:A casserole dish is for food.the words "I almost bought you flowers today"– no matter how cutesey the delivery– have the exact opposite effect of actually buying flowers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phishtaper Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 honey, why are there finger grooves in the margarine? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 when getting up at 7:00am to watch soccer try to be quiet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted October 31, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 Saying "Baby, dont be like that." is not going to calm her down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 pronouncing the phrase "sexually speaking", "thekthually thpeaking" isn't actually thekthy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badams Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 [color:red]DO NOT!!Put any sort of sign on her back and let her walk around the mall with it onPut any sort of extreme hot sauce into the ketchup bottle.Pretend to hit on her sisterHide laxatives in anything she’s going to eatHit her with water balloons when she thinks your about to go somewhere niceHide a dead fish in her room (or anywhere for that matter)Grease her toilet seat; no girl has ever simultaneously falling off a butter cover toilet seat and into love. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
badams Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 pronouncing the phrase "sexually speaking", "thekthually thpeaking" isn't actually thekthyI disagree... lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted October 31, 2008 Author Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 This one is for the ladies:The 'H' in Jesus H Christ does not stand for "Henry" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
d_rawk Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 Women are unlike men in that they expect more than oral sex on their birthdays. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
d_rawk Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 And Christmas, for that matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 when you give your GF a ring with 5 diamonds and a ruby on valentine's day... it's an engagement ring. Especially if she wears it on her left ring finger (and despite her reasoning that "that's the only finger it fits on") Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hal Johnson Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 Never, under any circumstances, say to your wife, "Your wearing that today?" And should it happen to slip out, dont try to explain yourself, it only makes it much, much worse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorgnor Posted October 31, 2008 Report Share Posted October 31, 2008 Fine does not mean "you look great" it means "that'll do". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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