Patchoulia

Here's another one...I had a work nemesis (who eventually did get canned, after making my work life unbearable for about year) who was, quite possibly, one of the dumbest guys ever.

He had serious attendance and punctuality problems (not to mention that, in addition to being not that bright, his personality was entirely charm-free).

He emailed in sick every day for a week. First surmising that he had somehow contracted food poisoning. Then he explained that their brand new fridge had broken, all the food and gone bad and he had continued eating it and that's how he got sick.

The sad thing is, I can almost believe that he *would* eat an entire fridge full of spoiled food.

Ah, I love threads devoted to workplace insanity, inanity and stupidity.

I got a million of 'em..but first, I'll share one of my all-time favourites..a resignation letter we received last year:

Dear [GM Name],

Over the past year or so, I have learned real qualities of having a job. I thank you for that! I have learned how not to be shy, how to deal with work and I learned the value of a dollar.

But there was something bothering me that I just couldn't let go--you. You have made my working experience a living nightmare. Day after day, you're on my case. I honestly can't tell you why, but all I know is that's not the reason I'm quitting.

I'm quitting because this place sucks the balls.

I'd rather be working at McDonald's no offence.

Anyway I coulnd't handle all the bullsh!t I put up with. So I'm handing in my 2 weeks notice have a nice life. I'm sick of the bullsh!t..I even had a cupola managers call me at home repeetedly.Kissing ass is not the way to get promoted--it's the pussy way out.

Sincerely,

[employee name]

I'm still getting enjoyment out of that letter a year later...I'm sure our HR department would frown on such a thing..

"Sucks the balls" is a very useful phrase and, for some reason, the hilarity factor is increased exponentially simply with the addition of "the" preposition.

$3.5 million

Oooh! Great deal!

It feels like spring in Toronto, too. It's a beautiful day in the neighbourhood.

I think I might go frolic later on.

You Ottawa folk have some weird-ass hobbies.

Well, I love him. I'm over my bitterness at him for instigating the Phish break-up. Bring on the shows!

Don't ya know...phans don't like Trey anymore..he has fallen from his godly perch.

Why was I not informed?? ::

from jambands.com

Trey Anastasio Shares New Material

Last night in a recording studio north of Atlanta where he is currently working on his forthcoming studio effort, Trey Anastasio performed two sets of material before a few hundred people. Anastasio was backed by a five piece band which included two keyboardists, both Ray Paczkowski and Les Hall (Howie Day). Each of the two sets clocked in at little over an hour and much of the material was upbeat with extended energetic improvisation. In addition, the first set closed with four solo acoustic songs, one of which, “18 Steps,” Anastasio later performed in the second set as a full-on electric number. The acoustic portion of the night concluded with an emotional take on "Strange Design.” Other compositions over the course of the evening included “Gloomy Skies,” “Goodbye Head” and “Air Said To Me.”

ur a sucker...

Hey! Bite me, bitch! ::

Valentine's Day is for suckers.

If you call it "randomly getting loaded on a Monday night", I'll come. But if there are any hearts, flowers or teddy bears within a 50 ft radius of that place, you'll see a Stoned Phillips-shaped hole in the door.

The first time I saw those guys was circa '95 at the Toucan in Kingston (thanks Bouche/Booche) and dancing our collective asses off in (what seemed like) a meagre 2-foot dancefloor.

Good times!

Ed: please give a very special welcome to Beat Poet Night, the angry stylings of...... Steven

Stapes: Old man sitting at a bus stop,what DO you know about the price of almonds, when the world dissolves around us like icing sugar in the cold hard rain of reality?

Genius.

I caught him on "Breakfast Television" this morning...damn, he's funny. The host asked him how it was working with Cheech again after all these years and if they'd put their disagreements of the past behind them...Chong responded, "I'm an old stoner..I don't remember 5 minute ago, never mind years ago..)

And tonight's final Jeopardy category is:

GROUPINGS

A: Assclowns travel & congregate in these.

Q: What is a gagglefuck?

I'm more intrigued with exploring the extensive "disc golf community" T-Bone's talking about...

Maybe someday they'll base an episode of CSI in the "disc golf community"....much like the one centred around the "Plushie Convention"...

I thought mandatory first song was "Knockin' on Heaven's Door"?

Every second Monday I have to be at work between 7:30-8:00..which means getting up at 6...yesterday was one of those Mondays....

I hope to make it out again soon (perhaps Monday the 31st!)

I'll have to check my calendar....

j/k Thanks for the invite...I'm going to be bring one (or more) delicious dishes (including myself)...

Moderate - ferocious snooting with heavy periods of thick slurring, followed by intense stumblestorms.

Stumblestorms? Excellent! ::

That's pretty sweet--what's the weather supposed to be like up there this weekend?

Freeker..too close to the speaker..getting’ a substantial shock…

Stapes forgets his moves and blows his audition for the New Kids on the Block cover band...

You guys are having a vegetarian potluck and I wasn't invited?

::

You're all dead to me.

First vinyl purchased with my own money:

The Big Surf Sound (K-Tel compilation of surf music..I think I was 6)

Billy Joel - Glass Houses

First tape ever given to me: Olivia Newton-John (Physical) (I was remember being absolutely amazed that my dad picked it out what was "in" at the time..then he revealed that he'd asked the store clerk..I was so proud of him..I think I was 8 or 9..)

First tape ever purchased with my own money: Joan Jett -I Love Rock n Roll

Damn, I'm old.

note to self-stop being so wierd.

No, no, no! Weird is good!!

Normal is boring.

Sheep go to heaven, goats go to hell.

Peach out, fruitslice!

(speaking of weird...hello? have you met me?)