bouche Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 “My roommate says, I'm going to take a shower and shave, does anyone need to use the bathroom? It's like some weird quiz where he reveals the answer first.â€- Mitch Hedberg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewRider Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 “If God dwells inside us like some people say, I sure hope He likes enchiladas, because that's what He's gettingâ€- Jack Handy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubberdinghy Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 Not funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubberdinghy Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 Jack Handy=funny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Northern Wish Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 "Go Sens Go" -rubahdingee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rubberdinghy Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 Yeah...I've said that a few times! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Im going home Donny Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 "Can't sleep....clowns will eat me." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Zimmy Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 “But I was going into Tosche Station to pick up some power converters!†Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esau. Posted March 13, 2010 Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 I don't like jail, they got the wrong kind of bars in there. - C. Bukowski Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bouche Posted March 13, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 13, 2010 "I bought a doughnut, and they gave me a receipt for the doughnut. I don't need a receipt for the doughnut, man, I'll just give you the money, and you give me the doughnut... end of transaction. We don't need to bring ink and paper into this. I just can't imagine a scenario where I would have to prove that I bought a doughnut. Some skeptical friend: "Don't even act like I didn't get that doughnut! I got the doc-u-men-tation right here... oh, wait it's at home... in the file... under 'D'... for doughnut."- Mitch Hedberg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
killatokes Posted March 15, 2010 Report Share Posted March 15, 2010 holy chit with the high brow references! "shut up brain! or i'll stab you with a Q-tip!" -homer j. simpson "jane....you magnificently ignorant slut..."( ) -dan ackroyd 1979"dave's not here" -tommy chong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phishtaper Posted March 15, 2010 Report Share Posted March 15, 2010 "The Answer to the Great Question Of.....Life, the Universe and Everything.....(is) Forty-two."Douglas Adams Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velvet Posted March 15, 2010 Report Share Posted March 15, 2010 "The appendix?!? I wrote a book on the appendix once, I even wrote the appendix, but they took it out."-Hawkeye Pierce, M*A*S*H, season ten, episode 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velvet Posted March 15, 2010 Report Share Posted March 15, 2010 "I don't know anything about music. In my business you don't have to."Elvis Aron Presley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hal Johnson Posted March 15, 2010 Report Share Posted March 15, 2010 "You don't find porn in bushes anymore" Davey Boy 2.0 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted March 15, 2010 Report Share Posted March 15, 2010 Bessie Braddock to Churchill: Sir, you are drunk. Churchill: Yes madam, and you are ugly, but tomorrow I shall be sober.Lady Astor to Churchill: "If I were your wife I'd poison your coffee" Churchill: "If I were your husband, madam, I would drink it." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Schwa. Posted March 15, 2010 Report Share Posted March 15, 2010 "He called the shit, poop!"~Billy Madison Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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