BONNAROO: my extensive review/pictorial/video diary

[dimafleck: the living legend.]

[color:red]WARNING: this is probably going to be extremely long, but its written more for myself than anyone...read if you like. Also, some of the pictures/videos are best viewed on your monitors brightest levels.

To Begin, let me say that I have done every single bonnaroo except the first one. This bonnaroo, was by far, and i mean BY FAR superior in every way. It was the most comfortable festival I have ever been a part of, and that’s saying a lot considering its size. To give you an understanding of how incredibly comfortable it was, the Porto potties were cleaned 7 times a day.

THATS RIGHT, i said it, 7 times a day. Which meant that no matter how late, how sketch, or how much you really had to go, you could do it in a spotless (and at the very worst, respectable) crapper. GOOD STUFF.

The wash stations, the abundance of good food, the cafe's offering delicious espressos (KEY) ...everything was perfect. Even my 20 minute walk to Centeroo twice a day was fun. LOGISTICS this year were pretty much flawless.

Also, I saw very little ugliness at bonnaroo. No more old man sitting between trash selling PCP. No more shady dealers in brand new tie dye. No more idiots carrying babies at 3 in the morning all spun. I'm sure some ugliness was there, and I’m sure some horrible things happened, but i didn't see it, which leads me to believe it was RARE.

Bonnaroo was also the cleanest I've ever seen it. Much Love to clean vibes and the fans that were responsible for their garbage.

Bonnaroo also had a fantastic abundance of beautiful women...some were Rollin up in their Vdubs, and you know their pits aren't shaved...and others were Rollin up in their Cherokees, and you know their pits are shaved and we were all their together getting along and its beautiful.

and now for the PLAY by PLAY:

So like all festivals before it, Bonnaroo started out with a fine breakfast at your local and legendary greasy spoon. mmmm...brekess.

Followed by the required stop at the oh so convenient DUTY FREE for copious amounts of booze. This year is was:

2 Liters of Smitnoff

2 Liters of ICE BERG (it was a good deal)

1 Liters of Canadian Club

1 Liter of Grey Goose

1 liter of Captain Morgan's Dark Rum

3 30 packs of cheap American piss beer.

The Duty Free is also a great place to try on ridiculous furry hats that are supposed to represent Canada or something...."here you go honey, have this furry hat, I was in Canada, that’s what it’s all about there...."

FIRST UP ON THE AMERICAN FILTHY FOOD STOP: BIG BOY.

Upon further investigation, it turns out; I am Big Boy's taller, thinner, less successful brother.

While I was posing for a picture, my best buddy Daniel called up his broker and got horrible news....poor guy lost 2 million dollars in a botched trade.

I FUCKING LOVE ROAD TRIPS. OH WAFFLE HOUSE, how i love thee.

After 22 hours of driving and lots of D-tours and distractions (and lots of laughs) we are finally in line at about 4 in the morning Tennessee time. We are treated to a beautiful, misty sunrise.

After about only 40 minutes in line (GOD I LOVE HOW ORGANIZED THIS THING IS!!) we are in our spot and set up camp (the most annoying part of any festival)

Once we are set up, we waste no time.

Being concerned with our health and physical appearance, we do a little bit of working out...bonnaroo style.

AND NOW IT WAS TIME, THE FESTIVAL WAS ABOUT TO BEGIN...its time for the goods, the music and the ENTERTAINMENT!!!!.

THURSDAY

First up on the Thursday schedule was the COMEDY TENT. Morgan Murphy was complete crap and really sucked the life out of the room. Luckily Jon Reep put on a clinic....I’ll paraphrase one of his routines:

"I'm a redneck for the south so i love Beer.

You know what my favorite beer is?? BUD! wanna know why, its easy to order no matter how late or how drunk you are. Its simple, its short, its BUD. Ever try and order a Hieniken after you drank 18 Hienikens?

*drunk voice*

'Can I have a Hin-i-ne

a Hin-i-ne...

a hin-i-ne-here kitty kitty kitty'

You know what I’m going to do?? I'm going to start a beer company and name it 'UH! It will be super expensive, like 20 dollars a bottle....but at last call, everyone is gonna be ordering 'UH'"

Tom Papa also delivered a great routine. Demitry Martin was a tad disappointing.

After the comedy tent, it was time to go see the first band of the festival...DEVOTCHKA..good times, nothing too memorable, but a good time...great encore and a great lead man.

Next on the bill was TOUBAB KREWE. I have been listening to this band for like 2 months now, and they are blowing my mind. Their show sealed the deal and makes them one of my favorite new bands. The hard driving percussion, infused with world beat/Spanish sounds is brilliant. They had the best dancing crowd I've ever been apart of. It was not just a bunch of drunks doing the hippy jig (not that the hippy jig isn’t incredible). Most of the people around me were skilled salsa dancers. I tried to keep up and had a blast. SERIOUSLY, CHECK THIS BAND OUT. Toubab Krewe was so good, I couldn't fathom how anything else that weekend could top it.

BOY WAS I WRONG. Actually, its not that anything else topped it, it’s just that everything else was just as good.

FRIDAY

I spent my early afternoon relaxing at camp, saving energy for the crazy night that was to follow. Once I was ready to get the party going, my friend and I took a big water cannon and walked the grounds hosing people down, LOTS OF FUN. As far as music goes, my day started at G Love+Special Sauce. However, I stayed there for about 2 minutes. I'm not sure what bonnaroo was thinking putting him in the smallest tent, but it was packed and uncomfortable.

Refusing to let G.Love get me down, I bought a ticket to ride the Farris wheel and got a great view of bonnaroo and met some great people.

I then made my way to see Bright Eyes, and by that, I mean I took a much needed nap under a tree at Which Stage. I woke up from my nap ready to get the rest of my day going and headed over to WHAT STAGE for some OYSTERHEAD->TOM PETTY.

OYSTERHEAD was rockin with Les doing most of the entertaining. Overall, a very enjoyable set from a rare power trio of a band.

After Oysterhead, I headed into Centeroo for an espresso boost and a poop. Thank God I needed to do these things because I caught a great little treat on the SOLAR STAGE. The bonnaroo buskers loaded 10 naked hot girls from the crowd into an inflatable weather balloon one at a time. Then they shoved in one lucky dude. HALARIOUS.

Tom Petty delivered the goods. It was everything you would expect from a Petty show plus more. Fist pumpin rock and roll at its finest. The show was so much fun, my smile never left my face....his guitarist took one of the most impressive STAUDIUM ROCK solo's I’ve ever heard. Bringing out Stevie Nicks made my night.

LATE NIGHT:

Late Night at first was a disaster. I lost my friends, I met a lot of people with horrible vibes, and I crawled into a pretty bad hole mentally while on mushies....it was horrible. Just as I was about to give up and go back to the tent at 1 in the morning (BOOOOOOOO!)...I ran into my best buddy Daniel and just like that, he hit a light switch in my brain and I was back to smiling and having a ball. We spent the rest of the night walking around from stage to stage checking out bands.

We finally made it to the hip hop tent to watch COMMON wrap up-his set, and Common was pretty much the only disappointing set of the weekend. It wasn't my brand of hip hop, and I don't think the audience or Common was feelin it.

However, Common was done after about 10 minutes, and then it was time for BLACKALICIOUS. HOLY SHIT. Blackalicious' set was by far the greatest hip hop show I’ve ever been apart of. It was even better than Dela Soel the previous year. They went on super late and by that time, lots of people had left, so everyone in the tent had lots of room to dance, and lots of incredible energy. I swear, at one point, GIFT OF GAB was rapping so fast and the beat was so locked, I was on my knees pounding the floor in elation...wild. WHAT A GREAT NIGHT...I needed the bad to make the GOOD feel that much better.

SATURDAY

ahhhh Saturday, the biggest party day of the whole festival. I started my day fairly early on Saturday to see Bill Frisell. While waiting for Bill to hit the stage, I met two super cool chicks from Austin, TX and we went for some coffee's together. I love meeting great people at bonnaroo, especially when they are gorgeous girls. I spent most of Saturday and Sunday alone, and pretty much ended up meeting a load of incredible people. I never really felt "alone".

Anyway, Bill Frisell was great. That band carried a great groove. After about 45 minutes I decided that I wasn't going to be missing moe.'s acoustic set at The SONIC STAGE and made it to the Sonic stage to catch the tail end of Gomez's show there.

After Gomez's set, I moved on up to have prime spots for moe. Their acoustic set was loads of fun. It made me really proud to be a moe. fan. The crowd was super cool; passing around free beers and joints, yelling funny crap at the band and just having a blast in the hot sun. Hot chicks dancing on garbage cans provide an important service to music festivals. The show offered everything that I love about moe., minus the incredible spacey jams. Moe. played a super fun acoustic set with a hilarious rendition of Blister in the Sun as the encore.

After moe. it was back to THE OTHER TENT for Amandou and Miriam. WOW. WOW. WOW. Check this band out. Incredible African sounds mixed with pop sensibility and soul satisfying vocals. I was planning on passing by their set and hitting up Beck, but I ended up staying till the end and hittin Beck a tad late.

Beck was hilarious. It was so much about the music he was playing, but more so the show that him and his band were putting on. HILARIOUS. The puppet show on the screens was very creative and made 40 000 people laugh their asses off.

To give you an idea of what the show was like, at one point, Beck played acoustic guitar while his band ate their dinner on stage. After they were done eating their dinner, the band went into a percussion jam on stage using their dinner plates/glasses. NOW THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT.

My buddy and I left beck a tad early to go take care of business and catch snippets of MMW,CLAYPOOL, and CYPRESS HILL. On our way over, he managed to sexually assault a puppet.

All three bands (CYPRESS, CLAYPOOL, and MMW) were putting on rockin shows, but you can't catch it all, so I was thankful for having seen some glimpses. A few poops, a few coffees, and a few burritos later, we were on our way to meet up with everyone else at RADIOHEAD

Honestly, this was my first Radiohead experience, and I came to the conclusion that I much rather see Radiohead in Toronto than at Bonnaroo. I just didn't feel it at Bonnaroo. At Bonnaroo, I want to rock out and dance my ass off while feeling nothing but incredible vibes. I don't want to stand around thinking about how incredible something is. I know I'll get booed, but I left Radiohead about half way through. I needed to eat and get myself together for the long night ahead of me. Had I not left, the rest of my night would have probably been ruined. I did manage to snap this photo.

Plus, I saw Paranoid Android and 2+2=5, the two songs I needed to hear. So for a "casual, but still know the power of radiohead" type of fan, I got what I needed. LIGHT SHOW WAS UNREAL.

LATE NIGHT LATE NIGHT LATE NIGHT

Okay, first off, the Masquerade Ball is a genius idea. Not so much because the music inside the "costume only party" is incredible, but because it gets all of bonnaroo into the costume mood. I saw so many costumes that night , and met so many hilarious people. I too, was wearing one hell of a costume. CHECK IT. (pay respect to the shoes)

So late night. My first stop was at BALKEN BEAT BOX. All I can say is that I was totally blown away. Balken Beat Box takes second prize for the dancing skill level of their crowd. The band was pure entertainment. The beat was so pure, the energy on stage was magnetic and I've never seen music like it. Toubab Krewe and Balken Beat Box are the two bands that I went into knowing nothing but the name and left a true fan. SEE THIS BAND IF YOU HAVE A CHANCE (MONTREAL JAZZ FEST).

After seeing Balken Beat Box tear apart their 1 hour time slot, it was time to go wander before I hit the MASQUERADE BALL . I hit up Super Jamfirst and stayed for about 10 minutes. I just really wasn't feelin the vibe. I understand that Trey and Mike were probably rippin it apart, but for me, I'm really over Trey. I really don't need to see Trey play another Mr. Completly or Axilla for the millionth time trying to find himself as an artist, especially when there is incredible new music to be discovered. Superjam really was the nail in the coffin. I'm sure those that still feel Trey had a blast, and I'm not knockin their love for the guy or the show, but for me, I really am over it.

So a brief wonder over get some beer, and I ran into the film crew from Life Aqautic.

Two things I noticed about wearing a costume at Bonnaroo:

1)You run into hilarious people also wearing costumes

2)It is way easier to meet gorgeous girls

So it was time to get in line for the MASQUERADE BALL being held in the Comedy Tent. What a great place to put it too, because everyone I ran into at the Comedy Tent was hysterical. Some of the funniest people I've ever met in my life, I met inside the Comedy Tent. Like this couple dressed as Wind Up Dolls.

Once the music began, I realized that I had gotten everything I could get out of the comedy tent. I stayed for about 30 minutes and soon found it was a bunch of members from moe./umph. I had seen this exact formula at Summercamp 2 weeks earlier, so I decided to hit up DUMPSTAFUNK

DUMPSTAFUNK was funky. What more do you need to know??

By the time Dumpstafunk finished up their set, I was ready for some SASHA.

SASHA, SASHA, SASHA.

Definitely the highlight of all the late night shows I saw that weekend. The energy was through the roof, the beats were pumpin, and the vibes were unreal. Sasha started at around 3:30ish, and played to about 7am. It got so bright outside that I put my shades back on. I met a weekend’s worth of incredible people at this show. The austrialian girl who came on a whim while visiting NYC, my neighbors from camp that smoked me out, the girl who loved my shades, Scoobydoo, the squirrel with a pouch full of nuts, the dude playing incredible bongos to sasha, and the list goes on and on.

At about 5:30 in the morning at around dawn, I walked by these two cuties from Philly and spent the rest of the show partying with them. Foxiest chicks at bonnaroo. TOO COOL.

Sasha finished up at about 7am and people were still dancing their asses off. PROPS TO ALL THOSE MADE IT TO THE END AND DID IT SAFELY.

SUNDAY

By the time Sunday had rolled around, I was ready to take it easy. By that I mean I took my chair and a bag with about 10 beers and a bottle of Vodka to main stage and stayed the entire day.

CODETALKERS->FLECKTONES->moe.->Phil & Friends

what more can a boy ask for really....?

I made friends with an incredible couple for Georgia who were also doing the entire day at Main stage and we took turns buying each other beers and saving spots.

The Codetalkers blew me away. Holy shit, what a band, I really need to see these guys again and I'm kicking myself in the ass for missing the PJC show.

The Flecktones were superb, as usual. They are totally different now because they played most of their shit from the new album.

moe. brought it. I thought that the last time they played bonnaroo mainstage (04), they were really intimedated and were too afraid to be themselves. This time, they kept it safe, but still rocked it out. Rob's playing is getting crazy. He really is taking his bass playing to new levels. GOOD FOR HIM. Their set kept the crowd happy and dancin, and my smile never left my face. They really are my favorite band.

Highlight was seeing Al take his Rebubula solo while laying on his back and then watching Rob walk over and step on his face and start slapping away.

CLASSIC MOE.

So PHIL

Whats cool about the scheduling this year is that it really brought out an eclectic crowd. However, the main stage was so hippy on Sunday, that by the time Phil hit the stage, all that remained were a bunch of hippies. When it comes down to it, the finest crowd in the world is a bunch of groovin, happy, friendly hippies. Best crowd at bonnaroo. Sharing, dancing, smiling, it was all awesome.

Phil's first set was really the most impressive set I saw all weekend. Sure I had a blast at everything else, but push come to shove, Phil really did show why he was the last to play.

ONE WORD: POWERHOUSE.

Georgia Represent

The weather this year at bonnaroo was PERFECT. Dry all weekend, but never too hot. Couldn't ask for anything more. Right as Phil starts the second set, BOOM, buckets. I'm talking pouring rain and freezing wind.

I stuck it out and ran to my camp site to change and come back dry. By the time I made it back for Phil, the rain had passed and the entire crowd was topless and dancing their asses off.

What a great way to end the WEEKEND.

Best TRIP of my life thus far.

I learned so much about myself and the world, I met so many incredible people, and I had the greatest time. [color:red] THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.

follow this link to all my little videos I took with my digital camera...they range from 5 seconds to about a minute and will give you a great view from where I stood all weekend. The file is kind of big, but has videos from RADIOHEAD, SASHA, BALKEN BEAT BOX, BECK, SUPERJAM, and many others. CHECK IT.

Edited June 22, 2006 by Guest

[Booche]

I want to make serious love to you.

[dimafleck: the living legend.]

dude, the feeling is totally mutual.

[phorbesie]

Wow...what a great review and awesome pics! Looks like so much fun. Awesome.

Thanks for sharing

[scottieking]

Well done, Dima. I love when people take the time to do this stuff. Looks like a great festival.

One downside to the teaching gig - It has kept me from every Bonnaroo.

One upside - I'm getting paid to read your story while my grade 12's sweat through my politics exam!

Makes me horny for Lollapolooza!

[paisley]

well done man... glad you had such an unforgettable trip... sounds like a serious blast!

[dimafleck: the living legend.]

anyone attempt the video download? is it workin?

[ollie]

Good job Dima. Thanks!

[Cully]

Great review, but you are still a dick!!!

How's that for number 1000...

Edited June 22, 2006 by Guest

[bouche]

i'm downlaoding the vid. thx for the diary.

where are all your hot chick photos?

I want to do a romance inside of you.

I am very strong physique and I can hold a very large woman down for 3 hours...I am strong, I can throw rock at a gypsy from 15 metres. 10 metre if I am chained up.

[ollie]

Anyone wanna make sex crimes?

[Guest Low Roller]

Dima, while I have no carnal desires towards you like the others, I do wish to buy you a beer. And when you're not paying attention, cut a lock of your hair.

[bradm]

While I have no carnal desires towards you like the others, I do wish to buy you a beer. And when you're not paying attention, cut a lock of your hair.

The hair on his head, right?

Aloha,

Brad

[dimafleck: the living legend.]

bradm, i'm not picky...espeically when you get a little wine in me...

Last time I drink so much wine, I end up with lady boy.

[Guest Low Roller]

Doesn't matter where it's from. It's for my merkin.

[gentlemonkey]

thanks for the report Dima. I've had to read it in chunks throughout the day. me read slow, eh.

[mister slippery]

anyone attempt the video download? is it workin?

taking forever, so i gave up.

too bad, wanted to see Sasha.

still, great read, nicely written, glad you had oodles o' fun.

[dimafleck: the living legend.]

i'm going to upload single videos and repost links.

[bouche]

I clicked through all 300 of them. no cute chicks. I think Dima is making some shit up.

I'd say 160 megs is overkill for these. There's nothing interesting at all going on. It was sorta like the grand parents at Niagara Falls with a Super 8.

[dimafleck: the living legend.]

what the fuck? 300??

thats weird

i only uploaded like 20 videos.

maybe i added pictures by accident....

and you got some crazy grandparents.

Edited June 22, 2006 by Guest