kung Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 My lady and I are doing what's called the Master Cleanse, nothing but yummy fresh lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne for 3 days. They recommend at least 10 days which is so fucking lame, these people must be emaciated soy bombs from the get go. 'All the vitamins and nutrients you need' yeah right fucker I'm starving. How can I need 3000-5000 calories daily based on my exercise regime and then just get by on a couple hundred? Anyways had my lovely internal salt water bath this morning, stay close to the loo after taking a quart of sea salt water is my advice. Now we're having a double serving of yummy lemon maple cayenne goodness. Wish me luck. The toxins stored in my fat deposits are rotting my fucking brain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tungsten Gruvsten Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 good fucking jesus hell christ! best of luck... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Low Roller Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 Best of luck! How's it taste? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamH Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 Man, I'm going to get fired for obsessive laughing because you. Lemme know how it goes and maybe Katie and I will give it a try. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snarfmaster C Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 kung - i do the master cleanse at least once a year. the first couple days are the hardest for sure. if you've got absolutely killer headaches on the first day you can slow down the toxin release by eating a piece of fruit (an apple, pear or some grapes are good ones) - preferably organic! it's good that you've got someone to do it with. i find it helps to keep a container of the drink ready-made and just sip on it throughout the day. my advice - keep yourselves entertained so you're not thinking about food and go easy on yourself - take a nap or just lay low and get to bed early. get out in the fresh air too - walks are good - keep the body's fluids circulating! since you've got a partner you oughtta trade massages too - treat your bodies good. i'd recommend a short fast (like 3 days is probably good) if it's your first time, but damn, you'd be surprised at how much your body is still processing after a week with no food! definitely an awesome experience. i've achieved some crazy states of mind after 7 or 8 days. excellent. better than any other high i've had cause it's so so so real. good luck with it, and enjoy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pootie Tang Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 Hey, I was thinking of doing this as well, is there a website or a place where I can get correct information on how it is done?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phishin4groove Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 damn thats sounds crazy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bONES Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 quote: is there a website or a place where I can get correct information on how it is done?? earthfreak is your woman for correct info on the master cleanse she wasn't kidding when she said she does it at least once a year! the "lemonade" actually tastes really good:) the cayenne gives it a bit of a kick i lasted 3 days once with earthfreak at a national rainbow gathering in Montana...it was SO hard because all the food there was so kind and FREE we broke the fast on raisins soaked in spring water, sprouts and sunflower seeds...mmmmm we had a very sensual "trip" in the wildflower meadows that day...we cheated and ate petals from the wild onions flowering Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snarfmaster C Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 don't know about a website. i originally read a little booklet about it. the booklet kinda sucked - i'm a science-geek and the science behind it was pure bullshit. physically though, it works, it feels awesome, and i don't like or trust science anyway, so i think it's great. the recipe: juice of 1/2 lemon 2 tablespoons of medium grade maple syrup (get the good stuff from a health food store) - the med grade is important (it's the darker one) cause it has more minerals/nutrients in it a pinch of cayenne (i think it's like 1/16th of a teaspoon, but how the hell do you measure that, i sure don't know) - the more cayenne you can take the better. all this in a big glass of water - hot or cold. i usually triple this recipe and fill up one of those nalgene containers. you're supposed to drink not more than 10 of these drinks in a day, but i can usually only get through 2ish nalgenes (ie 6 or 7 single recipes) then, every morning before anything else you drink a quart of lukewarm (ie body temperature) salt water (one of these nalgenes with ~2teaspoons of organic sea salt) CHUG IT yeah, nasty, i know. i couldn't keep it down the first couple times i tried it. then , 30-60 minutes later be very near a toilet.... the salt water is the same density as your body's fluids so it don't absorb into the 'fluid processing' organs.... it flushes out yer intestines... yup. you should take a day or two before the fast to eat simpler foods - raw fruit and veg, beet and dandelion greens are good for starting the detox process. lots of water. about 10 days into the fast you should get through the nasty coated tongue / detox stage - you've made it! break the fast easy - fresh juices, dates, figs, easy to digest organic fruits and veggies for a day or two and then bring in grains etc. oh - kung - that's one bit of advice i forgot - scrub your tongue off often - it'll feel awesome to get rid of the pasties. i think that;s about as much useful info as any website would give... unless you're looking for miracle stories of hundred day fasts that sure cancer and everything else Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Large Marge Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 Man, you kids are HARD-CORE! I can't even get myself to drink 8 glasses of water a day!!! (and we're talking un-salted ) PEACE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kung Posted July 16, 2003 Author Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 I have to admit that as I'm reading this good advice I am so close to breaking down and I'm like a day and a half in (day and 3/4???). Trust me it's hard peeps. I can feel the shit oozing out of me (literally rank pits, coated tongue, let's not even talk about number two). Still it's no incentive as I'm starving and lost the last of my love handles in my sleep last night. I got nothing left to burn and the toxins aren't even getting me high. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pootie Tang Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 quote:Originally posted by kung: I have to admit that as I'm reading this good advice I am so close to breaking down and I'm like a day and a half in (day and 3/4???). Trust me it's hard peeps. I can feel the shit oozing out of me (literally rank pits, coated tongue, let's not even talk about number two). Still it's no incentive as I'm starving and lost the last of my love handles in my sleep last night. I got nothing left to burn and the toxins aren't even getting me high.I hear by day 4 you start to hallucinate like mad, that must be enough incentive to keep going, come on man, you can make it if you try!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pootie Tang Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 quote: Originally posted by earthfreak: don't know about a website. i originally read a little booklet about it. the booklet kinda sucked - i'm a science-geek and the science behind it was pure bullshit. physically though, it works, it feels awesome, and i don't like or trust science anyway, so i think it's great. the recipe: juice of 1/2 lemon 2 tablespoons of medium grade maple syrup (get the good stuff from a health food store) - the med grade is important (it's the darker one) cause it has more minerals/nutrients in it a pinch of cayenne (i think it's like 1/16th of a teaspoon, but how the hell do you measure that, i sure don't know) - the more cayenne you can take the better. all this in a big glass of water - hot or cold. i usually triple this recipe and fill up one of those nalgene containers. you're supposed to drink not more than 10 of these drinks in a day, but i can usually only get through 2ish nalgenes (ie 6 or 7 single recipes) then, every morning before anything else you drink a quart of lukewarm (ie body temperature) salt water (one of these nalgenes with ~2teaspoons of organic sea salt) CHUG IT yeah, nasty, i know. i couldn't keep it down the first couple times i tried it. then , 30-60 minutes later be very near a toilet.... the salt water is the same density as your body's fluids so it don't absorb into the 'fluid processing' organs.... it flushes out yer intestines... yup. you should take a day or two before the fast to eat simpler foods - raw fruit and veg, beet and dandelion greens are good for starting the detox process. lots of water. about 10 days into the fast you should get through the nasty coated tongue / detox stage - you've made it! break the fast easy - fresh juices, dates, figs, easy to digest organic fruits and veggies for a day or two and then bring in grains etc. oh - kung - that's one bit of advice i forgot - scrub your tongue off often - it'll feel awesome to get rid of the pasties. i think that;s about as much useful info as any website would give... unless you're looking for miracle stories of hundred day fasts that sure cancer and everything else Thanks for the help on this, I'll keep you posted when I give it a try. I think I'll have to wait till after my run of shows in the next month, then I'll really be ready for a good detoxing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snarfmaster C Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 quote: Originally posted by Pootie Tang: [/qb] Thanks for the help on this, I'll keep you posted when I give it a try. I think I'll have to wait till after my run of shows in the next month, then I'll really be ready for a good detoxing![/QB] best to do it while it's warm out - yer body gets pretty cold without fuel. good luck to you! before you start get yourself motivated -pumped up to go for the max time you want. i find i've gotta go into it thinking i'll go for 2 weeks, then 5, 6, 7 days in i start to reevaluate - listen to your body it'll let you know. and kung, yeah, the first couple days SUCK - it's hard, i know. go for a slow, easy walk (preferably not in the city past all those yummy smelling restaurants ) - you gotta get away from temptation and take your mind with you! keep goin - you can do it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Schwa. Posted July 16, 2003 Report Share Posted July 16, 2003 quote: The toxins stored in my fat deposits are rotting my fucking brain Eureka! I knew it was SOMETHING. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kung Posted July 17, 2003 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 yeah I'm real brain damaged, must've been all those books I read Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paisley Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 I had a floating rib last week that got bumped into my liver and I ended up with this wierd headache for a few days, a bad taste in my mouth, dizziness (all on top of broken rib pain) if you're going to try and free up your toxins I definately recommend the fasting route Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
headygouda Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 quote: Originally posted by earthfreak: the salt water is the same density as your body's fluids so it don't absorb into the 'fluid processing' organs.... it flushes out yer intestines... yup. Hmm... I don't think so. Not to be a super-anal scientist or anything, but that statement doesn't hold any water (pun intended). Density or conc of salt solution will have no effect on whether or not the fluid goes through the intestines. Your body will extract water out of anything/everything unless it is already saturated. One (nasty) scenario that comes to mind which truely 'flushes out your intestines' is drinking milk if you're lactose-intolerant (like me)... trust me, if you've been there, you KNOW what a REAL flushing of the intestines feels like... oh yeah, you'd know if you were unlucky enough to get the Norwalf virus too One more thing about fasting too, i'm sure ya'll know.. the extent of cleansing really depends on your toxin levels, your fat levels and your metabolism. The idea is to minimize caloric intake such that your body starts to break down its fat stores to utilize for energy; this is when your toxins should hopefully be released and cleared from the body. If your metabolism during fasting is not high enough to burn what sugars are left in the body, you will not really cleanse those toxic fat stores! So I guess if you're hungry, that's a good sign 'cause it means your blood sugar levels are dropping and your body will switch to fat soon!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arcane Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 Considering all the effort I spent in putting the toxins into my body, what makes anyone think I'd want them out? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
headygouda Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 When you go sober for a while...the buzz of thsoe toxins getting released is sometimes unreal! Definitely a buzz you can't buy. I see your point tho... many of us make a point of keeping our body chronically chock full of toxins! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arcane Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 As a friend of mine told me, "A fifty-cent sandwich can ruin a fifty-dollar bender." Maybe I should put that in the "Best Advice" discussion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
schrybes Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 Hey guys, My boyfriend did it for 10 days and loved it! He said it was hard as hell, but now he's gonna try and do it for 20. I'm kinda curious to try it with him, but, after reading heady gouda's 'scientist perspective", I'd like to know more about it from the science/lab coat point of view. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SolarGarlic Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 OK, so Ive wanted to do this before. Thing is, how the hell do you lead a normal working day?? it sounds kinda nasty/smelly/intoxicating.....I hear you oooze like mad and really sweat. I sweat like a MOFO as it stands. is it really THAT oozy?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
headygouda Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 quote:Originally posted by schrybes: Hey guys, My boyfriend did it for 10 days and loved it! He said it was hard as hell, but now he's gonna try and do it for 20. I'm kinda curious to try it with him, but, after reading heady gouda's 'scientist perspective", I'd like to know more about it from the science/lab coat point of view.20 days!? Is he trying to loose weight or something? Or was the buzz just so good he wanted it to last a few days longer??! If you fast the way kung described for 20 days and have a normal body wt for your height/age/sex , then you'll prolly break down a lot of your fat and move on to protein... ie. loosing muscle mass. Guess it really depends on what your goal or purpose for fasting is! I think if you've never done it before, then you shouldn't even consider going for 20 days. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tungsten Gruvsten Posted July 17, 2003 Report Share Posted July 17, 2003 Science! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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