Cully Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 "Here comes the Metric System" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paisley Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 if only all of this life could be but smokin the righteous green n watchin Simpsons at Cully's Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cully Posted January 5, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 I can't wait to see you @ NERO my friend. Stapes told everyone that I wasn't going to go to the show (during the NYE after-party) and there was a huge scene!!! Everyone made me promise that I was going to be there. Bring on the FUN!!! Barney: David Crosby? You're my hero! David: Oh, you like my music? Barney: [surprised] You're a musician? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paisley Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 righteous! gonna be blasts indeeds! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cully Posted January 5, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 "Folks, I'm often asked about my qualifications. Well, I may not have a lot of "credentials" or "training", but I tell you one thing: I'm a Ph.D. in pain." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NewRider Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 "I'd just like to say this gig SUCKS!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchoulia Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Marge: It's almost lunch time. Do you know where your brother is tutoring?Lisa: Pfft. Tutoring? The only thing Bart's teaching is guerilla combat in Shelbyville.Marge: Well, do you have a number where we can reach him?Lisa: No, Mom, Bart and some kids ran off to wage war on Shelbyville!Marge: [gasps] Homer! Come quick! Bart's quit his tutoring job and joined a violence gang! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cully Posted January 5, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Marge: But this will be so confusing! The mailman won't know what to do. Did you think of the mailman at all before you did this? Homer: Yes, briefly. Marge: And what about the tattoo on my you-know-what? Homer: Oh, Honey, they have acids that can burn that off. Marge: But I fell in love with Homer Simpson! I don't want to snuggle with "Max Power"! Homer: Nobody snuggles with Max Power. You strap yourself in and feel the "G"s! Marge: Oh, Lord. Homer: And it doesn't stop in the bedroom. Oh, no. I'm taking charge! Kids, there's three ways to do things. The right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way! Bart: Isn't that the wrong way? Homer: Yeah, but faster! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchoulia Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 But, on the plus side, I knocked over the Sunsphere...and crushed a new car, too!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Marge: What's wrong, Homie? Homer: [sighs] I went to the record store today and they were playing all that music I've never heard of. It was like the store had gone crazy. Marge: Hmm. Record stores have always seemed crazy to me, but it doesn't upset me. Music is none of my business. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hartamophone Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Fireworks: The Silent Killer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Homer says, "Just once I'd like someone to call me 'Sir' without adding 'You're making a scene.' " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Apu: I have come to make amends, sir. At first, I blamed you for squealing, but then I realized, it was I who wronged you. So I have come to work off my debt. I am at your service.Homer: You're...selling what, now?Apu: I am selling only the concept of karmic realignment.Homer: You can't sell that! Karma can only be portioned out by the cosmos. [slams the door]Apu: He's got me there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 (I love these threads on a slow Friday afternoon) Homer: Fame was like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
questcequecest? Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 "I dont need drugs to enjoy this, just to enhance it!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 "Me Fail English? That's Unpossible!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Marge; Grandpa, are you sitting on the apple pie? Grandpa: I sure hope so... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freeker Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Krusty the Clown: Kids, we need to talk for a moment about Krusty Brand Chew Goo Gum Like Substance. We all knew it contained spider eggs, but the hanta virus? That came out of left field. So if you're experiencing numbness and/or comas, send five dollars to antidote, PO box... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patchoulia Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Marge, you being a cop makes you the man...which makes me the woman. I have no interest in that, besides occasionally wearing the underwear (which, as we discussed, is strictly a comfort thing). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cully Posted January 5, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Selma: How do you do it, Homer? Homer: You take an ordinary bedsheet, fold it around like th-- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Wiggum: Put out an APB on a Uosdwis R. Dewoh. Uh, better start with Greektown. Friday: That's "Homer J. Simpson", Chief. You're reading it upside down. Wiggum: Uh, cancel that APB. But, uh, bring back some of them, uh, gyros. Friday: Uh, Chief? You're talking into your wallet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamH Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Duffman: Hey Duff lovers! Does anyone in this bar loooove Duff? Carl: Hey, it's Duffman! Lenny: Newsweek said you died of liver failure. Duffman: Duffman can never die, only the actors who play him. Ooh yeah! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 Homer: Marge? Since I'm not talking to Lisa, would you please ask her to pass me the syrup? Marge: Dear, please pass your father the syrup, Lisa. Lisa: Bart, tell Dad I will only pass the syrup if it won't be used on any meat product. Bart: You dunkin' your sausages in that syrup homeboy? Homer: Marge, tell Bart I just want to drink a nice glass of syrup like I do every morning. Marge: Tell him yourself, you're ignoring Lisa, not Bart. Homer: Bart, thank your mother for pointing that out. Marge: Homer, you're not not-talking to me and secondly I heard what you said. Homer: Lisa, tell your mother to get off my case. Bart: Uhhh, dad, Lisa's the one you're not talking to. Homer: Bart, go to your room. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 “Son, when you participate in sporting events, it’s not whether you win or lose: it’s how drunk you get.†Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booche Posted January 5, 2007 Report Share Posted January 5, 2007 (edited) Homer: [drunk] Look, the thing about my family is there's five of us. Marge, Bart, Girl Bart, the one who doesn't talk, and the fat guy. How I loathe him. Edited January 5, 2007 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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