Velvet

I love the whole world.

http://www.cbc.ca/sports/hockey/story/2009/03/30/sp-hockey-fictional-five.html When hockey writers put together their lists of the Top 5 best players of all time, a few of the greats always get overlooked. Where is the love for hockey's top fictional players? In defence of the imaginary, here are our Top 5 greatest fictional players of all time. #5 - Guy Édouard Raymond "Eddie" LeBec Eddie Lebec (Jay Thomas) was a recurring character on Cheers, one of the most successful American sitcoms of the 1980s. He was a superstitious, French Canadian goalie playing for the Boston Bruins. Lebec's accent was about as Quebecois as the construction workers building the new Yankee Stadium. Eddie was married to acerbic waitress, Carla (Rhea Pearlman). After Eddie retired from hockey he got a job as a penguin in "The Wonderful World of Ice," a travelling skating show. Then, in 1989, LeBec was killed off the show. Cheers writer Ken Levine says Pearlman wanted Thomas fired. Apparently, Thomas had complained (on his radio show) about how much he hated kissing Pearlman every week on TV. Pearlman heard every word. She pushed her bosses to give Eddie Lebec the kiss of death. A few weeks later, in the episode "Death Takes A Holiday On Ice", LeBec was crushed by a Zamboni. Call It: TV's coldest character assassination. Eddie and Carla's song: Oh, Canada. If He Was Real: Former Bruins backup goalie Vincent Riendeau. #4 - Jacques 'Le Coq' Grande Another French Canadian goalie makes the Fictional Five: Jacques 'Le Coq' Grande (Justin Timberlake) from Mike Myers' film, The Love Guru. Grande steals the wife of Toronto Maple Leafs star Darren Roanoke. Le Coq wears Speedos and the goalie mask made famous by puck-stopper Jacques Plante and Friday the 13th heart-stopper Jason Voorhees. His team is the L.A. Kings. On defence is non-imaginary NHLer Rob Blake. The last time Blake played a big game against Toronto, he was on the ice with Wayne Gretzky. The 1993 Kings beat the Leafs in seven games before losing the Cup to Montreal. The Love Guru gives Leaf Nation a little revenge. The Leafs win their first Cup in more than 40 years. It's fictional, but you can't have everything. There's plenty of Denis Lemieux (Yvon Barrette) in Grande. Lemieux was the Quebecois goalie for the Charlestown Chiefs in Slapshot. Timberlake's a graduate of the Denis Lemieux school on how to speak hockey 'Frenglish.' He delivers some of the best lines in the film. First Line: "Ding Dong. Did someone order the special Quebec pizza, huh? Uh, you know, like in the porno." Second Line: "Don't look at me with that tone of voice or I will punch you in the shirt!" Scouting Report: He's big between the pipes. If He Was Real: There was a real Jacques Lecoq. He was an actor, called the "father of modern mime." Aren't you glad you finally know? #3 - Hockey Superstar Big Bobby Clobber In addition to being a hockey superstar, Big Bobby (Dave Broadfoot of CBC's Air Farce) is remembered for being the main reason for the mandatory helmet rule. If NHLers are stereotyped as the dumbest of all athletes, thank Big Bobby. It's the chicken (cannon) or the egg debate. Did Big Bobby create the image of the dim-witted hockey bruiser or did 1970s bruisers create Bobby Clobber? Either way, Big Bobby is a first-ballot, fictional hockey Hall of Famer. Here's an example of Big Bobby in his prime: Reporter: When you look back at all of those years in hockey what do you miss the most? Big Bobby: My teeth. If He Was Real: Flin Flon, Manitoba's own hockey superstar Big Bobby Clarke. Captain of the goon squad Philly Flyers of the 1970s, Clarke once said "They always try to play with our minds. But that won't work with our club. We've got 20 guys without brains." #2 - The Hanson Brothers (Slapshot) Hockey's Hanson Brothers (Steve and Jeff Carlson and Dave Hanson) were all hockey players, but not all brothers. Steve and Jeff had a third brother, Jack. He was supposed to be in the film but had a higher calling — a calling-up to the Edmonton Oilers, just in time for the 1976 WHA playoffs. Of the brothers, Steve was the best player. He skated for the Oilers too, sharing ice with 17-year-old Wayne Gretzky in 1978-79. The next year he was in L.A. with the Kings and a teammate to another legend, Marcel Dionne. It could be argued that no one, real or imaginary, did more to shape the image of the Canadian hockey player than the Hanson Brothers. Call It: The official first line of Good Canadian Hockey. Not bad for three boys from the U.S. Midwest. If They Were Real: Easy. Pick three of Viking, Alberta's Sutter Brothers. #1 - Pierre Lambert, The Quebec Nationals Lambert (Carl Marotte) was a hit in both official languages. He was the star of CBC's Lance et Compte (He Shoots, He Scores ). The show was the first series to be shot in French and English at the same time. It was a hockey soap opera, much like this year's edition of the Montreal Canadiens. Lambert was the hot-shot rookie on the Quebec Nationals, a fictional NHL team. All similarities to the Quebec Nordiques were purely intentional. Marc Gagnon was the, Lafleur-like, aging superstar. Special mention goes to Yvan Ponton who played no-nonsense coach Jacques Mercier. Ponton also played the assistant captain of the Charlestown Chiefs in Slapshot and Jean Charles in Les Boys. He's a fictional hockey legend. The original series ran across Canada from 1986 to 1988. Several versions have aired in Quebec since then. Roch and Roll: Juno winner Roch Voisine played Lambert's teammate Danny Ross in season three. If He Was Real: Sidney Crosby (Separated At Birth). The young sensation sent to save a franchise. Honourable Mention: Dan and Jerry Flynn. Main characters of Leslie McFarlane's book, Dynamite Flynns. McFarlane's son is Hockey Hall of Fame member and Hockey Night in Canada veteran Brian McFarlane.

Ahhh, Finger Lakes. Where I saw my second Phish show. 06-22-95 Finger Lakes Performing Arts Center, Canandaigua, NY 1: Sample in a Jar, Scent of a Mule, Ha Ha Ha, The Divided Sky, Guelah Papyrus, It's Ice, Strange Design, Maze, Cavern, Sweet Adeline 2: Theme From the Bottom-> Tweezer-> My Generation*-> Tweezer-> Tweezer Reprise E: Acoustic Army, While My Guitar Gently Weeps *The Who cover (first time played) Alright, back to your WSP talk.

Or more eloquently, "We make the kind of music that the people that like our music like."

Two more weeks for me!

Weird that he has a sunburn from the neck down.

It was way less hyped this year, and I participated accordingly. Last year I went all the way and ceased power usage for the whole hour. This year I did the same, with the exception of leaving the tv on for half of the hour. COPS was on.

Exactly the question I was meaning to ask but I'm too drunk.

Now how much would you pay?

Woah. Totally offensive dude.

What's a lease for, anyways? "The museum's 49-year lease for the federally owned property was unceremoniously transferred this month to the Department of Public Works, which means the current Conservative government has effectively killed an idea that was conceived, nurtured and brought to fruition by the former Conservative government of Brian Mulroney." "It was absolutely heady" at the museum's opening 17 years ago, she says. "It showed we were world-class -- it was mind-blowing. And it's all been trashed."

I'm okay seeing The Point go. As for The Inside Track - well, let's just say we have a game around here that involves making sure we turn the radio off right after Wiretap before the first note of the Inside Track theme can annoy my ears.

Looks like I'm looking for a pair for SPAC.

Hopefully until the fall!

I'm finally going to admit defeat. Shut out of SPAC tix. Hopefully phorbesie got some!

I just get lonely sometimes.

And his avatar showed a nice, innocent, nonbashing chap. By the way, what's going on in the avatar there punk?

I think both of these dates have been cancelled. Don't quote me on this, but if you were gonna head down to either of these shows you should probably call first for a heads up.

All of these are confirmed via reliable internet sources (ie official websites, myspace pages, posted newspaper articles, except CRAvery and Monkeyjunk, who told me personally): Alan Parsons Project Mick Taylor David Lindley Jackson Browne C.R. Avery Tony D Power Hour Chris Smither Crooked X Dave Mason Kiss Monkeyjunk Ryan Shaw Los Lonely Boys David Maxwell Steve Marriner NewWorldSon Bob Taillefer Sugar Blue Jeff Beck

Ryan Shaw on July 9th http://www.tourtracker.com/artist/ryan-shaw/551957 Looks like another Pedal Steel Guitar Summit! Bob Taillefer is coming too http://www.debbo.net/ This suggests that Counting Crows and STP are possibilities: http://chathamdailynews.ca/ArticleDisplay.aspx?e=1494790 KISS, Counting Crows, Stone Temple Pilots at Bayfest Posted 1 day ago The Observer Bayfest’s rock weekend lineup is official, with KISS, Counting Crows, Stone Temple Pilots and The Trews hitting the stage in July. Organizer Michele Stokley said she was relieved to finally get the word out. “People have been so anxious to know the lineup. It’s been more overwhelming this year than any other year,†she said, noting online petitions and social networking groups focused on Bayfest 2009. “It’s great that people are putting so much thought into Bayfest.†Internet rumours had focused on KISS making an appearance in Sarnia, and Stokley said she can finally confirm it. “We’ve been trying for years and years to get them,†she said, noting organizers came close last year but conflicting tour dates kept the legendary rockers away. “It feels really good; we’re really excited.†The two-weekend Rogers Bayfest concert will kickoff Thursday July 9 with U.S. rockers Counting Crows. The band is well known for their 1993 hit single “Mr. Jones,†and most recently for the song “Accidentally in love,†featured on the Shrek 2 soundtrack.

Waitaminnit....you're posting from work with concerns that you might be laid off?

Then all the lottery money would go to Phish scalpers. She's avoiding the middleman.

I'll bet Prince hasn't laid down a cent for a new cd in decades. Also, when he changed his name and Bob Wiseman tried to take it over Bob had lawyers breathing down his neck. It seems that a lifetime of fame has skewered the man's perspective.

It would be fun to move into a water tower.

Freeker used to have a foosball table. Perhaps he still does. We don't really hang out any more.