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The "Why" thread...


CyberHippie

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why am i out here, on a ledge, in the middle of the night with my pants around my ankles holding this 30 pound cinder block? why does this cinder block have a rope attached to it? and why is the other end of that rope attached securely to my penis?

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Why did my car break down and need repairs? Why did someone slash my brake lines? Why is someone trying to kill me? Why does the car now have a problem that it didn't have when I brought it into the shop?

Lastly, why won't the monkeys in my brain stop screaming? Or at least scream less piercingly?

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Why did someone slash my brake lines? Why is someone trying to kill me?

Seriously? That is messed up man!

No, actually. But it sounds a lot cooler than saying that they just ruptured, eh? It makes my life seem a lot more interesting than it really is.

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Why, when I call Bell Canada for assistance do I get automated "Emily"? Why doesn't she understand a fu©king word I say when I have a very clear speaking voice and was repeating word for word her options? Why did it take me 8 minutes to speak with a real person? Why did the real person say "I see here you were speaking with Emily..."

Why is my phone problem still not solved?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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Why am I me and not the queen of the world?

Because some people couldn't handle such a wonderful world, and, while your influence would be more widespread were you Queen, it would be diluted (wonderful, still, but diluted); having you here, down in the trenches with us regular folk (who might wear a tennis shoe or an occasional python boot), lets your pure wonder shine through. By having you here, then there, then somewhere else, you leave seeds of wonder in those with whom you come in contact.

(Well, it's either that or the height requirement... ;))

Aloha,

Brad

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