Magnum Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 (edited) Hi y'all, Magnum here: I have been frequenting the Toronto scene quite a bit, with TC and the crew from the Robin's nest in Hawaii. I'm Lovin' the vibe, even if there aren't egnough Hawaiin shirts for my tastes.... Anyways, I was talking to Rick the other day and we agree that the women in Toronto are of another breed. What I mean is in Hawaii all I'll have to do back home is, bear the chest, order some pina coladas, give 'em lay maybe put on some Burt Bacharach albums (the flower necklace thingy) and BAM...Magnum is on his way to charning the pants (literally and figuratively) off some sweet lucky lady. However, since I've been haningin' in the T-dot, my polynesian-hawaiian p.i.-beach bum-studly short,short-mack game ain't working. Magnum has been spening some lonely nights watching re-runs of Charlie's Angles and thinkin' what if?... Seems the Toronto ladies, while smart, stylish and sexy are an exceedingly complicated bunch. So I ask you Toronto jam-band women...What makes you tick, what do you want to hear from a dude you might dig...what turns your crank? What does a sucessful tropical crime fighter like me (or anyone else for that matter, except Kojack he's a bitch.) have to do to get one of my perfectly tanned feet in the proverbal door. My inquiring moustached mind wants to know. [color:red]Maybe I should just go ask AJ from Simon & Simon. The ladies love that guy. It's tough to be a man baby! Edited November 8, 2005 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bouche Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 A.J. maybe past his prime ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
livingstoned Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 So I ask you Toronto jam-band women...What makes you tick, what do you want to hear from a dude you might dig...what turns your crank? What does a sucessful tropical crime fighter like me (or anyone else for that matter, except Kojack he's a bitch.) have to do to get one of my perfectly tanned feet in the proverbal door. It's tough to be a man baby! just introduce yourself then say - hey wanna make out? That does it for me everytime! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnum Posted November 8, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 So I ask you Toronto jam-band women...What makes you tick' date=' what do you want to hear from a dude you might dig...what turns your crank? What does a sucessful tropical crime fighter like me (or anyone else for that matter, [i']except Kojack he's a bitch.) have to do to get one of my perfectly tanned feet in the proverbal door. It's tough to be a man baby! just introduce yourself then say - hey wanna make out? That does it for me everytime! Magnum is humbled by your game. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PimpDaddySweetPants Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 Magnum, as they say in the Pimp game; "You ain't pimpin', unless you limpin'" ya' dig. What I mean, player, is that you gots to put in on display, for these hunnies to play. Ya' feel me. how do thing this player here is gettin' over? It ain't his mad style. It's probably the fact he's totally crunked and fearless. More juice to be loose. Ya dig! Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alexis Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 i wonder what's wrong with her finger....i wonder if the girl who's dry humping her from behind lovin the camera had anything to do with it. she looks like the type to have extraordinary vagicular muscles.magnum, doesn't it look like she's looking right at you? calling out? her friend's already taken, and with a f'd up finger to boot. you gotta figure out how to hit that shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarcO Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 Dear Alexis - hi, it's me Marc. I hope all is well. did you just use the word "vagicular"? thanks in advance.take care,Marc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alexis Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 dear marc,all is most certainly as well as it can be given my 7.5 hours of obligatory attendance at work with nothing to do but surf the net all day.i knew the grammar police would come after me for not using the correct terminology, which i know is vaginal. but that word is so mundane. i wanted something that would really grab people and make them think twice. and i've heard the word vehicular about 1000 times today. and i read the stupid jambands names thread and so i guess subconsciously i did the same thing and added 2 things together.I hope i've vagicularly brightened your day in my own special way.your pal,Alexis Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davey Boy 2.0 Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 "i wanted something that would really grab people and make them think twice"well i guess in a sense you succeeded there... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MarcO Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 Dear Alexis - thank you for your response. Your mating of the word "vaginal" and "vehicular" is most titillating.you rock hard.titanically titillated,Marc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bradm Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 The only other word I associate with "vehicular" is "manslaughter"...but I think "vagicular manslaughter" (unless split, as "vagicular man's laughter"...) has connotations we just don't want to deal with at present...Aloha,Brad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Im going home Donny Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 (((I heart Alexis))) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnum Posted November 8, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 i wonder what's wrong with her finger....i wonder if the girl who's dry humping her from behind lovin the camera had anything to do with it. she looks like the type to have extraordinary vagicular muscles.magnum, doesn't it look like she's looking right at you? calling out? her friend's already taken, and with a f'd up finger to boot. you gotta figure out how to hit that shit. Oh I know, I know..It's all magnum you're a studly Hawaiin P.I. just go up an hit that shit. The ladies are bound to fall for your coiffed mustache and elephant sized package, but it's not that easy. You know although I may wear kaki nut-huggers like no other and surf-ski with the best of them, Magnum is still afraid, just like everyone. If only all the ladies that were interested in the Magnum, stared me down, like this one in the picture with the extraordinary vagicular muscles, maybe then I'd know to make a move, but in the t-dot it seems even if a gal stares you down and chats you up it don't mean shit! So confusing! And besides Magum's no wing man! [color:red]I'm going to get blasted with TC and smoke some Maui Wowie. Magnum's sad... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Large Marge Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 The Tdot ladies go for culture, Magnum (as Livingstoned has so eloquently illustrated). Now's your chance: Free Ticket to VAGICULAR traffic Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnum Posted November 8, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 (edited) The Tdot ladies go for culture, Magnum (as Livingstoned has so eloquently illustrated). Now's your chance: Free Ticket to VAGICULAR traffic Culture...I've got that in spades. I'm from Hawaii, I know polyneisan style and cooking. I'm very well travelled (I used to be in the navy). I'm honorable, I served my country in Vietnam and everything. Ohh...... I don't know meeting the right female counterpart to my P.I. bravado, seems so daunting. I think I'm going to head back to TC's and smoke some more of that killer weed and get drunk on Miller lite. Fuck it! Edited November 8, 2005 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gentlemonkey Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 (edited) so many startling things.. in that pic. First and foremost... the DUDE!! He's wearing a soccer uniform, and it looks like he has no EYES! Edited November 8, 2005 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazlo Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Peanut Butter. Works every time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jay Funk Dawg Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Maybe going for the "Joey Lawrence" look might help. Girls like that boyish dofus routine.. also works for this Joey My advice is to keep your stick on the ice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dancingbear Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 marco, alexis, bradm :grin: :grin: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnum Posted November 9, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 (edited) Maybe going for the "Joey Lawrence" look might help. Girls like that boyish dofus routine.. also works for this Joey My advice is to keep your stick on the ice. Oh I see, you mean the women around here go for the labotamy/semi-retarded clean cut thing. So you're saying if I act brain dead, roll up the sleeves on my t-shirts and use a tonne of productin my hair, I'll get hit on in this town? (but then again even if you get hit on in Toronto, it doesn't mean they dig you. It just means you get the privelage of talking to them.) Fuck it! I'm staying in Hawaii for a while where, when people actually give you signals they're digging you and you act on it, it actually goes somewhere. More poi, lays, tanned asses and cold beer....where are my Jimmy Buffett albums....I'll put those on Jimmy understands me! Edited November 10, 2005 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CyberHippie Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Best thread of the month! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SevenSeasJim Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 The worst (or best) part is that everytime I read Magnum's posts I really hear Magnum's voice. Scary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Magnum Posted November 9, 2005 Author Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 (edited) The worst (or best) part is that everytime I read Magnum's posts I really hear Magnum's voice. Scary[color:blue]Maybe that's the key...I gotta stop thinkin' so much and wisper my deep-sexified narrtive-drawl in these hunnie's ears. Although now that I say it, it sounds like a creeper manouver. Edited November 9, 2005 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Chameleon Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Maybe you should bring all those hot Hawaiin women up to Toronto on a some sort of foxy exchange program. Maybe that'd help all of us other strugglin' brothers in the scene. We sure could use the help You sratch my back I'll shave yours! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamH Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 I wonder if Jimmy Milbury, Esq could give Magnum some tips. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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